lollypopsicle.

tumblr!

2011-06-19T01:03:00.001+07:00

haven't posted anything for a while.

life's good, thank God.

i'm writing more in tumblr, so please kindly check my tumblr.

toodles! :)

meow.

2011-02-02T21:53:00.002+07:00

almost had a catfight with my older sister. well well. that just what might happen when you have more than 7 girls in the same house, moreover with their crazy hormonal system.

i don't hate her, but i don't think i love her either, not even as a sister.

she's a stepsister of mine, fyi. i grew up with her, but i kinda almost never take her as my sister, moreover as a role model. nah.

she's just.. idk.

how could i respect someone when she can't even give me something to be respected? HOW?

is that my fault?

i ain't respect her. i did, a bit. then she lose it now. her loss.

i don't think my life wud be worse without her. i guess.

she has never make a big effect to my life.

not someone to be looked up to, for sure.

i'm not taking any of her craps. let her boyfriend hears it, because i won't.

when she talked in front of the bathroom door when i was taking a bath, i hope she could see my face. i was humming and singing quite cheerfully, and answering every single sentence she spilled. kurang ajar? you bet. i don't care.

JUARA DUNIA MAIN ENGKLEK!

2010-12-09T23:23:00.002+07:00

jago banget nih gw main engklek pasti kalo udah sembuh.

tadi jatoh di rumahnya Om Andi, gara2 ga liat susunan ubinnya tinggi rendah gitu, padahal ga ada 5cm selisihnya, dan ga lagi megang apa2. kalo lagi main bb ya ga heran ya, tapi giliran lagi main bb malah ga kenapa2.

ini pertama kalinya kena ankle, jadi harus dilestarikan ceritanya hahahaha.

seumur2 main basket ga pernah kena ankle. main di hutan juga kaki ga pernah kenapa2. giliran lagi anteng malah jatoh ampe segini. shit happens.

stressful banget ya ternyata gabisa jalan. mesti loncat kemana2 pake 1 kaki. plus, i'm on my period. kebayang ga sih ribetnya. mati.

pengen nangis daritadi, selain gara2 sakit, berasa kaya invalid gitu gasuka aja jadi gabisa ngapa2in.

but i know tears won't help, jadi gausahlahya gausah cengeng.

no one could help me but myself, apalagi udah almpst midnight gini. mau ga mau deh.

still, i'm trying to be grateful. gw jadi tau rasanya gimana gapunya kaki sebelah. dan gw jadi tau kemampuan gw seberapa heuhehehe abis ini kan lumayan bisa jadi atlit engklek, kalo jadi juara dunia kan asik abis #ngayal awkakakkaa stress.

semoga cepet sembuuuhh, sebelom natal harus udah sembuh. besok diurut, ayo bangunkan mode masochist. amen!

somedaaaayyy~

2010-12-09T22:59:00.000+07:00

Know it. Know it but I was too naïve to admit that I know it. 
Thanks for opening up, dear. I'll try my best to understand, to not do the same mistake ever again. 
I wanna be the one that understands you most(:
I know that you wuff me, and I do to, so I hope we'll be together again someday(:

time flies!

2010-11-01T01:50:00.002+07:00

huello! it's the 1st of november already! how time flies :D

so excited for this month, hope it'll be even better than October..

and moreover, it's nearer to December to come! hooray!

can't wait for the holiday, christmas, and the end-year trip.

and else. muehehehehe.

really hoping for the best for this month.

may God kindly bless this month for me, you, and each and every one of us.

xoxo!

it's time.

2010-10-16T23:42:00.002+07:00

hey there. long time no write here.

it's been 7months or so. it's time for me to move on.

i'm not supposed to be this muzzy when i finally feel this numbness.

it's been too long, actually.

but at one point, i'm glad.

and i'm sort of relieved, seeing you are loved enough.

well, i got my whole life to deal, so..

see you another time, i guess?

maybe in the end of the year..

or one day in Netherlands. hope so.

xoxo

birthday wishlist :D

2010-09-19T21:45:00.001+07:00

next week is finally my birthday!

here's some stuffs that i want :D

#1. white lily(s) or red roses.

#2. zara acid denim shirt.

#3. zara boots.

#4. red or black pump shoes. or white wedges.

#5. surfer girl's cute, reversible black bag.

#6. actionsampler. or disderi3lens.

#7. D90. or D700. :p

there, there..

2010-09-17T23:04:00.002+07:00

long time no write!

at least, not in this blog. go follow or see my tumblr for most updated posts :)

hey hey there. whatcha been doin?

i'm.... great!

everything's going quite well, mark the forgetting and moving on parts, thanks for this new person that shows up in my life :)

you see, when you love someone so deep, it won't fade eventually. not even with anyone new coming in your life. you're only being distracted, but the feeling won't go anywhere. not even when you starts to love that another someone.

but that feels like i already cheated on him even before we had anything in particular..

yaudah sih. i'm not going to deny my own heart. i'm not going to be a hypocrite.

campus' life is getting hard, moreover the social life. got lots of decisions to make, and those are long-term ones. geez. so not easy. at times like this, i wish i could back to my high school time, when there's no such thing as bad organizations, bad leaders, and stabbing here and there.

but well, that's life. gotta face it doesn't matter how undelightful it is. toodles!

practically.

2010-07-19T23:57:00.003+07:00

well i think i'll just bless them, even if it's too hard for me to do.

i wish them the best, 'cause i've never wanted to see the one i love unhappy. that's the only reason.

a thing or two.

2010-07-14T23:25:00.000+07:00

“Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don’t blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being “in love”, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.”

—	Louis de Bernières

unfolback.

2010-07-12T19:12:00.002+07:00

gw baru balik dari nias hari ini, baru sampe jakarta setelah transit di medan.

idk what to tell about Nias. it's gorgeous. cuma.. ya gitu deh. perkembangannya slow banget.

getaway ke Nias ngasih gw banyak banget waktu buat mikir, dan berhubung indosat sinyalnya abal banget disana, jadi gw mau ga mau lepas dari bb. = lebih banyak waktu buat mikir dan merenung.

ditambah pantai yang aduhai calming banget deh.

soo, i made a decision. tadi gw unfollow 1 orang.

kenapa harus gw ceritain? karena ini bukan sembarang orang.

orang ini yang udah menghiasi blog gw pretty much hampir 1 taun belakangan.

i thought.. i've had enough.

someone said " pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

well. i've had enough suffering.

he messed around too much with my life lately. and i've had enough.

i'm not going to give him any access to make me suffer more.

i'm controlling my own life. i'm creating my own future.

dan terbukti, setelah gw unfollow, gw lebih tenang. jauh lebih tenang.

mudah2an dengan begini gw bisa let go.

soal nunggu.. urusan nanti lah. sambil jalan aja.

yang penting.. life must go on, no?

just for fun.

2010-07-04T00:56:00.003+07:00

About me (BOLD THE ONES THAT DESCRIBE YOU)

I am a morning person.

I am a perfectionist. (sometimes)

I am an only child.

I am Catholic.

I am currently in my PJs.

I am currently pregnant.

I am currently suffering from a broken heart.

I am left handed.

I am married.

I am addicted to myspace.

I’m shy around the opposite sex.

I bite my nails.

I currently regret something I have done.

When I get mad I curse.

I don’t like anyone.

I enjoy country music.

I enjoy Jazz.

I have a car.

I have a cell phone.

I have a pet.

I have at least one brother or sister.

I have been to another country.

I have been told that I’m smart.

I have been told that I have an unusual sense of humor.

I have had a broken bone.

I have caller ID on my phone.

I have changed a lot over the past year.

I have had surgery.

I have killed another person.

I have had my hair cut within the last week.

I have had the cops called on me.

I have kissed someone I knew I shouldn’t.

I have kissed someone of the same gender.

I have mood swings.

I have rejected someone before.

I have seen the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

I have watched Sex and the City.

I like Shakespeare.

I love to cook.

I love Michael Jackson.

I love sleeping.

I love to shop.

I miss someone right now.

I own over 100 cds.

I own over 100 dvds.

I own & use a library card.

I practice a religion that is not considered mainstream.

I read books for pleasure in my spare time.

I sleep a lot during the day.

I strongly dislike math.

I think Britney Spears is pretty.

I was born in a country other than the US.

I watch Soap Operas on a regular basis.

I will try ALMOST anything once.

I work at a job that I enjoy.

I would classify myself as ghetto.

I can name all seven dwarfs from Snow White.

I am currently wearing socks.

I am tired.

I am currently waiting for someone.

I lost contact with someone.

I hate Miley Cyrus.

I think Party In The USA is catchy.

I’d date Harry Potter.

I can name all the past presidents of the United States.

I know who was president before George Bush.

I love pickles.

I need the internet to live.

I prefer vanilla over chocolate.

I watched Star Trek.

I watched all six movies of Star Wars.

I own an Xbox.

I think music is life.

I. Music

(BOLD THE ONES IN YOUR ITUNES / IPOD)

Acceptance. Coldplay. Dave Matthews Band. David Bowie. Foo Fighters. Hellogoodbye. The Killers. James Blunt. Teddy Geiger. Linkin Park. Muse. Ok Go. Panic! At The Disco.Peter Bjorn. The Postal Service. Timbaland. Jack Johnson. Norah Jones. Drake. The Fray.The Wreckers. Michael Buble. Beyoncé. Metallica. Massive Attack. Queen. Journey. The Cars. Supertramp. Eurythmics. Sublime. The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Wu-tang Clan.Fergie. Sarah McLachlan. Band of Horses. John Mayer. Jason Mraz. Justin Timberlake. Michael Jackson. Kenny Chesney. Carrie Underwood. Lynyrd Skynyrd. Neil Young. The Beatles. Brad Paisley. Tim McGraw. Taylor Swift. P. Diddy. Jay Z. Lil’ Wayne.Three 6 Mafia Lil’ John. .Nelly. Young Joc. T.I. Sean Paul. 50 Cent. Eiffel 65. Ace of Base. The Underdog Project. Dream Theater. Santana. Alicia Keys. Incubus. Victor Wooten.Ludacris. Gorillaz. Matchbox 20. Paramore. Say Anything. Taking Back Sunday. Eric Clapton. The Darkness.Weezer. The Eagles. Jimi Hendrix. Nirvana. Smashing Pumpkins. Third Eye Blind. Metro Station. Motion City Soundtrack. The Rocket Summer. Tenacious D.Something Corporate.Maroon 5. Billy Joel. Reel Big Fish. Anberlin. Mae. Family Force 5.AC/DC. Hootie and the Blowfish. Electric Six. Outkast. R.E.M. The White Stripes. Prince.Mika. Crystal Castles.Britney Spears. Spice Girls. The Gossip. Lady GaGa. The Moldy Peaches. Macy Gray.Mandy Moore. Plain White T’s. Vampire Weekend. Yeah Yeah Yeahs.My Chemical Romance. Fall Out Boy. We the Kings. The Rolling Stones. Angels & Airwaves. The Beastie Boys. Black Eyed Peas. Boys Like Girls. Jonas Brothers. Demi Lovato. Selena Gomez. Cobra Starship. The Cure. Death Cab for Cutie. Deftones. Team Sleep. Filter. Goo Goo Dolls. Honor Society. Katy Perry. Kid Cudi.

II. Movies

(BOLD THE ONES YOU’VE SEEN)

Pride and Prejudice. Glory Road. The Princess Bride. Center Stage. Ocean’s Eleven. Seven. Newsies. Goonies.300. Robin Hood Men In Tights. Love Actually. Garden State.Donnie Darko. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. My Best Friend’s Wedding.Anchorman. Drop Dead Gorgeous. Wedding Crashers. Elf. Zoolander. Austin Powers. Clueless. Mean Girls. Hairspray. Moulin Rouge. Fight Club. Rocky. Pulp Fiction.What A Girl Wants. Kill Bill. Thank You For Smoking. Little Miss Sunshine. Requiem for a Dream. The Departed. Dawn of the Dead. Memento. Office Space. Snakes on a Plane.Boondock Saints. Say Anything. The Silence of the Lambs. Saving Private Ryan. Superbad.The Prestige.Just Friends. The Devil Wears Prada. Under the Tuscan Sun. Titanic. Steel Magnolias. Saw. Ace Ventura. She’s the Man. Because I Said So. Catch and Release.Music and Lyrics. Spanglish. Stick It. Step Up. The Fast and the Furious. Joyride. Halloween. The Italian Job. Crash. Must Love Dogs. The Last Kiss. Chicago. Harry Potter. Rush Hour. Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Clerks. Shooter. The Bourne Identity. Meet the Parents.Dirty Dancing. A Christmas Story. Rudy. National Treasure. Sleepless in Seattle.Miss Congeniality. The Science of Sleep. The Matrix. Everything is Illuminated. Good Will Hunting. Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. Empire Records. Phantom of the Opera. Lord of the Rings III. Click. Scarface. District 9.

(BOLD THE ONES YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN A COUPLE OF TIMES)

ER.Grey’s Anatomy.. Man vs. Wild.Scrubs. South Park.America’s Next Top Model. Gossip Girl. Sex and the City. Friends. Dawson’s Creek. The Big Bang Theory.Seinfeld. The Office. Lost.Arrested Development. That 70’s Show.Family Guy. The Simpsons. Veronica Mars. Project Runway. Bones. Iron Chef.Gilmore Girls. The Colbert Report. The Daily Show. Mythbusters. Avatar:The Last Airbender.24. House. To Catch A Predator. Whistler.Heroes. Aqua Teen Hunger Force.What I Like About You.Survivor. The O.C.American Idol.CSI. Boy Meets World. Law and Order. Numbers. Reno 911. I Love New York. Step by Step. Little People Big World. What Not To Wear.Whose Line is it Anyway?. Trinity Blood. Dead Like Me. Dragon Ball Z. Futurama.Dancing With The Stars… Glee.Secret Life of the American Teenager.Nip/Tuck. The Biggest Loser. Beauty and the Geek. Battlestar Galactica. Stargate SG1. The Inferno. Scarred. Wild N Out. Firefly. Medium. Star Trek. X-files.Sailor Moon. My Name is Earl. Six Feet Under. Cowboy BeBop. Degrassi

hello. i'm in pain.

2010-06-30T23:00:00.001+07:00

hello. i'm in pain.

i thought i'm fine enough, since i've been here one day.

but this is hell. can't even breath properly. help, anyone?

eh.. actually..

2010-06-29T15:12:00.003+07:00

eh ternyata, cuma bentar banget sakit hati nya.

itupun nyelekit doang.

sebenernya gw ga kaget2 banget kok. udah lama nyangka hari ini bakal dateng.

i still wanna know the reason tho..

i'm fine already. whoa.

yeah, i'm totally fine.

i'm reconsidering to ask you later, i'm not so sure now.

but well.. thanks.

thanks for not appreciating the past that we had.

at least, i won't be a person like you.

and now i'm reassured, that i'm totally fine without you.

anything but this.

2010-06-29T14:51:00.001+07:00

wah gw kaget..

kalo orang lain yang unfollow gw, gw bakalan slow aja.

tapi ini ELO yang unfollow.

i can't believe this.

gila ya, salah apa gw sama lo?

emang hak lo sih buat unfollow, cuma tetep ajaaaaaa..

SAKIT HATI.

ternyata gw masih bisa sakit hati.

Bounce Back, Bounce Higher!

2010-06-28T09:02:00.004+07:00

when you are able to see things from different sides, you will be able to transform the negative energy to positive one, and use it as your motivation, as something to push you, to pull you out of misery, and stand even taller than you were before.

that's what happen to me.

who has never had their heart broken? anyone?

some people lost their mind and do stupid and silly things, in dealing with it.

it's not easy, no.

i know how hard it was to deal with heartbreaks, to let go person whom you love, to deal with your own feeling and life, to arrange things all over again, and moreover.. to forgive and forget.

but well, i did that several times. not all of it were that successful, but i did.

this last time when my heart was broken, i learned lots of things.

i don't wanna be drop dead.

my life was fine without him, and now i'm fine without him.

don't mention how i love him, which is still as much as it's ever been.

just, i learn how to live my life without him.

see, i'm focusing more to my future, to what i wanna do, and what i've always wanted to do.

no boys around, please.

i've had enough with boys. men can wait.

see, this ability to get up, to bounce back when you're rejected or fail, the ability to recover from difficult situation is what you called resilient.

i heard this from A.R.Bernard, a pastor from NYC that came over to Jakarta preaching at a church.

in order to be resilient, you gotta:

have passion for life, someone else's life, and passion for a price that you have to pay.
have forgiveness in you heart.
have hopes, a desire for better future.
have faith; a strong belief that you can achieve that future that you want!

he said that rejection is part of life. it's inevitable.

you gotta be persistent, and have determination.

motivate and encourage yourself! don't count on people! count on God only. especially in times of failure and rejection.

thank God, i already have all those criteria that are needed even before i realize it, in this early age.

now, nothing could ever brings me down.

"the hardest part of achieving success is to get through the crowd on the lowest stage."

be blessed! xoxo

leave me be.

2010-06-25T00:52:00.002+07:00

set me free, leave me be.

itu kata Sara Bareilles di lagunya.

i'm setting my self free.

gamau ah yang namanya terikat sama masa lalu.

let go of the past, ken..

don't let it ruin your future :)

udaahh, sekarang ga ada ya urusan cowo dulu.

gw mau serius kuliah, tekad sudah bulat!

i know what i'm chasing after, dan gw mau serius. gamau buang2 waktu.

gw udah cukup membuang waktu gw yang berharga belakangan ini.

gw mau naikin IP, malu ah punya IP segini doang -.-

sekalian buat memudahkan buat nanti nyari beasiswa s2 yahooooo~

sama gw harus bisa naik sepedaah nih kayanya.

siap2 aja gitu hahahah kalo ngga gw naik apa dong disana entar? naik kaki?

duh semangat nih, harus direfresh terus biar semangat teruusss *joget2

naksir banget sama Leiden - maaf ya helsinki, kamu diselingkuhin..

okeh, belajar lagi ah, besok ujian globalisasi nih. wish me luck! :D

could this be?

2010-06-20T00:30:00.002+07:00

i wonder if this kinda thing is possible.

i don't know how.. i don't even want to.. but it seems like i understand, i feel what you're feeling, and it's been proven right for times.

we barely speak, don't mention meeting up.

we're separated way too far.

then, how could i know this?

and what does it mean?

first experience!

2010-05-30T23:47:00.002+07:00

tadi gw nekat nyetir innova, biasanya nyetir yaris. gede kan tuh. sebenernya gw ngeri juga sih, soalnya biasanya parkir di rumah, setir innova berat.

tapi yaudah. kalo ga nekat bukan niken namanya. haha.

tadi awalnya lancar, gw bawa dari daerah deha-pondok indah situ.

trus masuk tol. awieeeeee akhirnya gw masuk tol juga hahaha cuma bawa 80km/jam.

lumayan lah ya pemula.

tadi gw sempet mikir sih kalo cuma segitu bawanya, kalo gw nyetir sendiri ke kampus kapan nyampenya ya? hahah.

trus pas keluar tol, fine2 aja sampeeee lampu merah sebrang trakindo.

taksi busuk gabis sabaran pas lampunya ijo. gw dipepet kiri kanan.

eman dasarnya anak nekat plus pemula ngeyel gatau diri, gw disuruh ngerem, tapi gw gas aja terus ga mau ngalah. hahahaha. akhirnya breeeeeeeeeeettt nyerempet jazz merah di samping kanan gw. *maap ya abang.

trus turun, ngomong2 bentar, untung ga baret ga apa tuh jazznya, cuma catnya keserempet jadi putih2 gitu lah. tapi dipoles dikit juga beres.

soft skill berguna banget deh buat saat2 kaya gitu hahaha jadi ga ganti sama sekali, bermodal muka melas.

yaaaaaa, gw sementara kapok nyetir mobil gede. mau stick to yaris aja sementara sampe udah mulai jago lah. gw takut hahaha.

tapi semangat nyetir tetap berkobar! banyak yang bisa gw lakukan kalo udah dikasih nyetir sendiri hahaha.

pengalaman lah ya nyerempet :p

anw, yang nyetir jazznya lumayan ganteng loh. ekekekekee.

hello there, OS 5.

2010-05-29T19:39:00.003+07:00

setelah berjam2 perjuangan di guide fani sana sini, akhirnyaaaa teng teeeeenggg! nongol juga nih.

akhirnya hp kesayangan gw ke upgrade juga OS nya dari 4.6 versi asli abal nya, jadi OS 5.0

gw kira bakalan lebih enak gitu kan yaaaa, ternyata makenya sama pusingnya kaya upgradenya --- secara upgrade sendiri gitu bukan ke toko -- mana banyak banget yang ilang2an. puyeng banget deh. ini lagi gw restart aja ga nyala2. ngeri korslet nih.

sedih deh gw chat historynya ilang :(

pusing banget2an lah pakenya. gatau ya, belom biasa kali. masih tahap adaptasi.

doain aja ga kenapa2 deh, dan bisa berfungsi dengan normal, bahkan lebih baik.

toodles!

kepada kamu, rindu itu.

2010-05-26T22:03:00.003+07:00

semestinya tak kutelantarkan rindu yang terus menggugat hingga pagi

andai saja tak ada jarak yang mengunci langkah kaki,

ingin segera kusandarkan semua gelisah dan gundahku pada harum ikal rambutmu

menebar keteduhan, meremas kecemasan..

meninabobokan tangis semalam.

mengais lagi serpihan kata rinduyang kau cecapkan di tepian pagi

betapa kuingin mendengarnya beribu kali

seperti inginku yang selalu dahaga ingin mendekap dan rebah di dadamu

luruh dalam magismu, dan bertekuk pasrah dalam hatimu, satu.

dari buku "cinta itu, kamu".

oleh Moammar Emka.

hukum truk sampah.

2010-05-25T20:50:00.000+07:00

got this from a comment in an article in eRepublik.

Suatu hari saya naik sebuah taxi dan menuju ke Bandara. Kami melaju pada jalur yang benar ketika tiba-tiba sebuah mobil hitam melompat keluar dari tempat parkir tepat di depan kami. Supir taxi menginjak pedal rem dalam-dalam hingga ban mobil berdecit dan berhenti hanya beberapa cm dari mobil tersebut.

Pengemudi mobil hitam tersebut mengeluarkan kepalanya & mulai menjerit ke arah kami. Supir taxi hanya tersenyum & melambai pada orang orang tersebut.Saya benar-benar heran dengan sikapnya yang bersahabat. Maka saya bertanya, "Mengapa anda melakukannya? Orang itu hampir merusak mobil anda dan dapat saja mengirim kita ke rumah sakit!" Saat itulah saya belajar dari supir taxi tersebut mengenai apa yang saya kemudian sebut :

"Hukum Truk Sampah".

Ia menjelaskan bahwa banyak orang seperti truk sampah... Mereka berjalan keliling membawa sampah, seperti frustrasi, kemarahan, kekecewaan. Seiring dengan
semakin penuh kapasitasnya, semakin mereka membutuhkan tempat untuk membuangnya, & seringkali mereka membuangnya kepada anda. Jangan ambil hati, tersenyum saja, lambaikan tangan, berkati mereka, lalu lanjutkan hidup.

Jangan ambil sampah mereka untuk kembali membuangnya kepada orang lain yang anda temui, di tempat kerja, di rumah atau dalam perjalanan. Intinya, orang
yang sukses adalah orang yang tidak membiarkan "truk sampah" mengambil alih hari-hari mereka dengan merusak suasana hati.

Hidup ini terlalu singkat untuk bangun di pagi hari dengan penyesalan, maka:Kasihilah orang yang memperlakukan anda dengan benar, berdoalah bagi yang tidak.

Hidup itu 10% mengenai apa yang kau buat dengannya dan 90% tentang bagaimana kamu menghadapinya.

Hidup bukan mengenai menunggu badai berlalu,tapi tentang bagaimana belajar menari dalam hujan

done.

2010-05-25T20:07:00.003+07:00

well, i've made my decision. and this post is a contrary to the last one, i know.

i'm done with him.

it's not that i don't love him anymore, i'm just too exhausted being played so long.

it's my life. i choose how i wanna live it.. i don't wanna be trapped unto you like i used to.

i'm so over with that.

and i think you're gonna be happy when you know this, since i won't bother you nor disturb you anymore.

if i miss you later someday, i promise it won't hurt me anymore.

it's ok to miss somebody who was important in your life.

i'm not saying that i couldn't change my decision again later.

since i've prayed to God for so long and He still tells me to wait.

but i don't wanna live a life like this, it's hurting my very self.

we gotta live our lifes in separated ways.

we once met by fate, to make ourselves wiser and more mature.

you were once the best for me, but now you're not.

if someday we meet again in the intersection, if we're destined to be together, then we'll be. no worries.

i'm gonna be good. with, or without you.

and i wish you the best.

so long.

P.S. it would be nice if we still could be friends :)

hey you.

2010-05-24T23:26:00.003+07:00

hey, you.

happy birthday :*

better pray my prayer directly to God than to write it down here..

i wish you all the best. i really do.

i wish you have a wonderful day.

do you like the birthday present?

lemme know, will ya?

it's kinda hurt to see you being quite happy without me.

well, but at least you're happy.. so.. no reason for me to not to.

and i love you.

i wish i could be wherever you are right now..

i just miss you too damn much.

i remember.

2010-05-23T20:46:00.002+07:00

this song is mocca's.

i heard this for the first time when my roomate in Jember made this as her alarm tone,

and it hit me when i listened to it.

i asked avre, and by chance she has it.

here it is.

I remember...The way you glanced at me, yes I remember
I remember...When we caught a shooting star, yes I remember
I remember.. All the things that we shared, and the promise we made, just you and I
I remember.. All the laughter we shared, all the wishes we made, upon the roof at dawn

Do you remember..?
When we were dancing in the rain in that december
And I remember..When my father thought you were a burglar
I remember.. All the things that we shared, and the promise we made, just you and I
I remember.. All the laughter we shared, all the wishes we made, upon the roof at dawn

I remember.. The way you read your books,
yes I remember
The way you tied your shoes,
yes I remember
The cake you loved the most,
yes I remember
The way you drank you coffee,
I remember
The way you glanced at me, yes I remember
When we caught a shooting star,
yes I remember
When we were dancing in the rain in that december
And the way you smile at me,
yes I remember..

may trip.

2010-05-20T02:21:00.003+07:00

last trip was.. indescribable.

you may not have any idea what's on my mind.

it's not that it wasn't fun.

i laughed to death.

i met my lovely old (best)friends.

i met the keeper of my heart.

i met friends that i'd never met before.

but i had trouble sleeping at nights.

and that was because my heart was beating so fast i didn't understand why.

it had never happened before.

like i already said before, the trip was also my last test.

and...

i didn't change any of my decision.

nothing, and no one told me to. not even the Great Father.

sooo.. i'm waiting.

i once had waited for 3 years, for a boy that i like.

that didn't like me back in the end. at least he never tells.

3 years for a man that i love?

it will be piece of cake. i hope.

i'm accused to be an easy-bored person by my own dad.

but he doesn't know, when it comes to love, i'm not that kind of person.

i went to alkid (alun2 kidul) with chibi and his boyf, tadinya gerimis, trus pas turun mobil udah berenti. akhirnya gw mau nyoba jalan ngelewatin pohon beringin yang mistis itu. katanya sih kalo bisa ngelewatin dg mata tertutup, harapannya bakal terkabul *amin.

trus, gw kaget sih awalnya, jarak awalnya jauh banget. mana rame. tapi namanya gw kalo udah penasaran, maju juga akhirnya. dengan mata tertutup, gw berdoa, trus coba jalan. baru jalan bentar, mulai gerimis lagi. trus ujan gede banget. chibi nyuruh tetep jalan. yaudah. tanggung juga gw pikir. sambil berdoaaa, gw jalan. tau2 kaki gw ngerasain batu gitu, trus disuruh jalan terus, ngelewatin genangan air yang lumayan dalem, dan disuruh buka iketan mata gw.

and there i was, standing after the two big trees! wooohoooo!

succeded at my first try :D

dan kata chibi sama pacarnya, gw jalannya luruuuuuuusss banget dari awal mulai. hihihi gw seneng banget gatau kenapa. hahah.

mudah2an doanya terkabuuuul. amiiinnn. penuh perjuangan tuh :p

dan gw berubah total, jadi pendiem. ya mau gimana. gw sampe lupa mau nitipin salam dari masila. sampe lupa cerita soal alkid. ah parah deh.

next time must be better off. amen.

relevancies.

2010-05-20T01:40:00.003+07:00

If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?

And I hope you are the one I share my life with
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I'm praying you're the one I've build my home with

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right
And though I can't be with you tonight
You know my heart is by your side

I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

-daniel bedingfield

Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

in the end if I'm with you

I'll take the chance

-richard marx

eemm..

2010-05-10T23:49:00.002+07:00

i'll be there at saturday, but you're not available.

we'll meet.. eeeemm.. sunday, perhaps?

maybe this is good. me, not seeing you that often.

but i'm curious, what will happen between us?

what will happen later when we meet?

what will i feel?

everything that will be, will be.

at least, i'm seeing you. and it's relieving.

it hits me.

2010-05-09T21:54:00.004+07:00

it hits me quite hard.

well, i have never imagine that you will find someone new THIS fast.

or.. is it what men do?
getting over relationships easily?

the worst part is..

i'm in final exams.

and, i often miss you. still.

i wanna get over you. really. i wanna.

i wish it were that easy.

to get over you as easy as you have succesfully get over me.

And I hope one day you’ll see nobody has it easy,
I still can’t believe you found somebody new
But I wish you the best, I guess.

everybody knows - john legend.

should have been surprising.

2010-05-02T02:13:00.002+07:00

well. it really should. but instead, i'm not surprised.

im not that surprised.

wonder why.

and yeah, you move on too fucking fast.

i don't know how you do it.

well.. not really. i know how to do it too.

i just don't want to.

i can. i definitely can.

it's just, when i finally have the courage to consider someone else,

then you suddenly popped out, out of nowhere.

there, again.

it's like a sign for me that i shouldn't go looking for someone else.

i have some sort of hope back then.

and actually i still have it now,

even after i know about the apparently-not-so-painful fact.

wonder why.

i don't know what to do now.

i really don't know.

but.. things that happened these past few weeks apparently bring me back to you.

i don't know why this will happen.

me, meeting you in no time i mean.

but i think i'll find out.

when we meet again.

then, it'll be the very last test.

and what i should do next depends on that.

it will also be *maybe* my last effort.

Bach said..

2010-04-27T21:24:00.004+07:00

Miles can't separate u from anyone. If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? -Bach

so..?

warn.

2010-04-17T03:41:00.003+07:00

don't trust people so easily. moreover if they're your rival's bestfriend.

2010-04-15T23:47:00.002+07:00

i got this from @TheLoveStories.

Loving someone is NOT by seeing each other everyday. What counts is that somehow in our busy life, we remember them.

and it's really true. believe me, i've felt it for times.

heart and soul.

2010-04-15T23:39:00.001+07:00

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. -Judy Garland

who are you not to be?

2010-04-10T00:05:00.001+07:00

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually,
Who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us;
it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson

resah.

2010-04-09T23:38:00.001+07:00

resah nih --a

gatau kenapa cuma ga enak aja perasaan gw.

biasanya kalo bt juga ga begini rasanya.

kenapa ya?

ga enak ga tenang gituuuu aaaaaaaa duuuhhh. ck.

HL.

2010-04-09T23:30:00.002+07:00

last night was totaaaally crazzzzzyyy.

Holy Laughter works in me. crazy.

i can't help to stop laughing for around 1 hours and 45 mins.

no reason, and outta control. crazy, huh?

but it feels reaaaak good.

God says it's how He repays the tears i've shed.

well, this laughing thingy is the first time for me. lots of people have experienced it though.

wanna try? :D

koala kid.

2010-04-07T00:02:00.002+07:00

let's talk about koala. since i'm a koala kid, and you're the eucalypt tree.

'The koala lives almost entirely on eucalypt leaves. This is likely to be an evolutionary adaptation that takes advantage of an otherwise unfilled ecological niche, since eucalypt leaves are low in protein, high in indigestible substances, and contain phenolic and terpenecompounds that are toxic to most species. '

-wikipedia.

you're poisonous to other people but me :D

come home soon, baby.

i miss you.

i love you, eucal.

la hermosa casa.

2010-04-06T23:58:00.002+07:00

i'm your home. you said that yourself.

i'm sure, you're coming back home.

no matter how far you go,

no matter how long you will be away,

no matter how many pit-stops you'll have,

you'll come back home.

and when you finally do so, you'll find me here;

always here, waiting for you.

i love you.

after all those..

2010-04-02T15:19:00.003+07:00

every time i get to miss you, it's really torturing since i can't tell it to you.

you won't know.

you don't even reply my msg whereas you've promised before.

but still, after all the goods and bads we've been through, i love you.

in vain? perhaps.

2010-04-02T15:13:00.001+07:00

the more i wait, the more i get hurt.

i love you, and it seems like i can't stop loving you.

even if you don't love me anymore.

i can't stop this feeling.

eventho the more i'll get hurt, but i'm wating.

i'll wait.

until my heart can't take it anymore.

6.

2010-03-27T23:45:00.002+07:00

20:27.

27.09.09.

27.03.10.

today's supposed to be our 6th month anniv. i miss you sooo damn much.

at the end of the day, i can't hold my tears. i can't lie to myself anymore.

i was hoping for something good will happen between us today.

i was hoping.. big.

and now, it all vanished.

though, i miss you still.

i love you.

idk.

2010-03-25T19:01:00.002+07:00

i don't know. i miss you.

i love you still.

i'm not losing hope i don't know why.

above all rejections and torturing things,

i still have faith in us.

i'm not losing hope.

i'm not losing faith.

can you tell me why?

maybe because i've set my mind since i don't know when,

that you're the one i wanna spend my life with.

mampir jogja :3

2010-03-22T18:28:00.002+07:00

kemaren pas perjalanan pulang dari jember, sempet mampir di jogja cuma 2jam an gitu sih tapi mayaaannn :p

setelah perjuangan yang cukup panjang dengan perijinan lalalaaaaa, dan perjalanan darat naik bus yang geblek banget itu 13 jam lamanya dari jember, akhirnya sampe juga lah ke jogja.

berenti beli oleh2 makanan di jl. solo, gw beli bakpia keju :3

trus ga lama cabs ke malioboro setelah berkomplot dan melobi sana sini ahuahauhahahaa.

itu udah jam 11 pokoknya pas sampe parkiran malio, sang pujaan hati udah nungguin di deket parkiran malio *alah bahasa gw* ahuahaha.

trus abis ituuuu, gw buru2 kabur turun dari bus, pas napak di bawah, udah gerimis gitu trus gw jalan rada buru2 ke dia.

abis itu naik motor trus wuuung cabcus ke rumahnya gara2 gatau mau kemana udah malem juga haha.

dia gede banget badannya gara2 body-building nya sukses berat! (_ _!!)"

shock gw ngeliatnya ga ketemu sebulan tau2 jadi gede banget gitu dia pamer otot lagi ahuahahaha dasar deh.

untung tinggi, jadi ga begitu keliatan. tapi kalo udah tinggi, gede gitu sih ngeri juga ya -_-

intinya kmrn tuh lucu bgt kalo dipikir2 lagi, dan intinya sama2 kangen yegak? hahaha.

yang sangat disayangkan sih sbnrnya gabisa nemu jalannya lagi, cuma so far yaudahlah, at least i've tried..

makasih ya mbuuul udah dijemput dan dibawa terbang pas baliknya haha ampe ga berani ngeliat jalanan ngeriiii ehuehehe.

anw, i love you. :3

PNMHII XXI

2010-03-22T18:18:00.002+07:00

PNMHII XXI was great!

bagian favorit gw tuh pas SF, ato sidang forum, dimana politiknya tuh keliatan banget weheeee :3

kalo JSF, gw cuma nyoba sekali itu pun pas akhir2 gitu, lumayan sih, paling ngga kita berusara :p itu udah lumayan sih cuma benerin EYD gitu, kalo pas awal2 yang ngomongin ekonomi *soalnya yang dibahas soal ACFTA* bisa keritiiiinggg gw. gasuka banget deh iuch. sayangnya gw terdampar dan terperangkap di HI UPH yang konsentrasinya adalah perdagangan internasional atau international trade. kentut banget padahal gw mintanya di politik, dan gw benci banget sama yang namanya ekonomi haaaaaaaaaa.

overall sih seruu ya, asik gitu hehe anak2nya juga seru2.

nah yang jadi masalah tuh kondisi busnya, perjuangan banget deh buat nyampe Jember duduk di bus 25jam-an dengan kondisi kaya gitu, yang mana bikin gw pengen banget pulangnya ga naik bus, ga betah soalnya gila aja, dan dengan perjuangan yang panjang, sampe akhirnya ga jadi -____-

untung pas pulang udah ga separah itu, udah lumayan lah haha pake mampir ke jogja lagi kan :3

soal mampir ke jogja beda post ya ceritanya ehuehehehe.

intinya, gw mau ikut PSNMHII XXII, dan seterusnya, juga PNMHII XXII dan seterusnya sampe gw lulus! ahuahahahaa hidup!

i love you.

2010-03-07T22:29:00.003+07:00

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thousands of millions of times.

if only the fact that we love each other that matters.

"DO I LOVE YOU?"

2010-03-05T17:58:00.004+07:00

when someone said that they are owned by you, how could they end their ownership theirselves?

and when a relationship made and agreed at the first time by both sides, after such a long and hard process, how could it be ended up by one side only, when the other is really disagree?

thousands of question are flying in my head.

and i only know a question's answer.

"do i love you?" yes. yes. YES!

simple wish.

2010-03-05T17:57:00.000+07:00

i only have a simple wish.. that we could be like what we used to be.

illusion.

2010-03-04T13:34:00.002+07:00

i know i'm living an illusion for this 2 days.

this will hurt me even more at last, but i chose that way.

it's better than i lose you this way right away now.

even now, i can't help myself to stop bursting into tears.

i'm weak. i know that. i always know that.

it's just..

these past 8 months, you're there for me.

now i'm losing you slowly, what can i do?

i miss you already. really.

geez, i'm such a crybaby.

not one night.

2010-03-04T13:28:00.001+07:00

Not One Night - Mr. Big

I used to dream of only you
NOW I DON'T DO THAT
I used to messed to came to you
Oh now I don't do that
Since you've been gonna learn to stop
Try to hold on because

There's not one night, one single day
That I wouldn't give to you
So hold my night in every way
I try to forget you too

I thought you could tell me anything
Yeah you used to do that
Let me inside of everything
Yeah you used to do that
Never to change you least the tought
If you so strange because

Loneliness may come knocking at my door
Where I'm coming from that don't face me anymore
Tender-shatter-little-life on where I'm s'poseses to be
Of you're not used in thinking you come running back to me

Since you've been gonna learn to stop
Try to hold on because...

just take my heart.

2010-03-04T13:27:00.000+07:00

just take my heart - Mr. Big

It's late at night and neither one of us is sleeping
I can't imagine living my life after you're gone
Wondering why so many questions have no answers
I keep on searching for the reason why we went wrong

Where is our yesterday
You and I could use it right now
But if this is goodbye

Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you, but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go

Here we are about to take the final step now
I just can't fool myself, I know there's no turing back
Face to face it's been endless conversation
But when the love is gone you're left with nothing but talk

I'd give my everything
If only I could turn you around
But if this is goodbye

Just take my heart when you go
I don't have the need for it anymore
I'll always love you but you're too hard to hold
Just take my heart when you go

better be stranded.

2010-02-22T22:30:00.002+07:00

i don't know what's wrong with my life, but it seems like i have no passion for it lately.

i just........ not in the mood of doing a lot of things.

i just want to sit back, to think for a while, get out of my problems.

but what happened?

problems strikes. even rains on me.

great.

maybe better for me to be stranded in an island or so.

i really want to isolate myself from others, esp from my friends.

even, some old ones.

danger.

2010-02-22T22:08:00.002+07:00

it's funny, of how we love each other, but you're so busy you don't have time for me.

i spare my time for you, even in my busiest weeks, i try to spare my time for you. hbu?

i miss you.

you've been reaaaaaaaaally busy, and i miss you.

i miss your presence.

i miss your deep voice.

i miss your laugh.

i miss your jokes.

i even miss your anger.

i realize now that something dangerous is happening in me.

i'm getting used to your absence.

i haven't heard your voice for 5 days. maybe a lot of people take it as something usual, and nothing is special about that.

but well, with this long distance relationship, that means A LOT.

plus, you're absence for 3 days full, thanks to your busy-ness.

it's not that i don't understand. i TOTALLY understand.

i just have this thought, that if this keeps going on, how would we end up?

i wish i could tell you this right now, but i can't.

you're ill now, and i know you're very tired.

if i say this now directly to you, i know we would end up fighting, and i really don't need that right now.

waiting in excitement.

2010-02-13T10:07:00.002+07:00

this evening finally i'll meet my boyf again! gosh i'm so exciteddddd :D

i'll pick him up at the airport, then get back to my house, have dinner with my family, and we're planning to do some things together after that :)

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam so excited!

before that, i have tasks to do. but well, i have motivation to finish it up as soon as possible, sooooo, guess i'll be doing it in few minutes! toodles!

2 passes, 2 left.

2010-01-28T23:34:00.002+07:00

saya sedang menjanda. 4 hari, sudah lewat 2, masih sisa 2.

suami saya pergi ke sawah, mencari pengalaman baru. dasar bule. *ga nyambung haha.

intinyaaa.. saya kangen.

kalo lagi ada kerjaan, ada temen sih masih lumayan, ga begitu kepikiran, bisa dipaksa buat dialihkan ke hal lain deh. tapi kalo lagi sendiri, kaya sekarang, dan ditambah abis nonton the time traveler's wife, yang notabene di tengah2 bikin gw pengen nangis tanpa alasan yang jelas dan akhirnya gw nangis gara2 tu si Eric Bana mati, trus malah jadi drop-dead mellow gituuuu aaaaaaaa jadi kangen banget banget banget an sama si pacar.

lama banget ya pulangnya haduh saya sudah kehabisan ide mau ngapain lagi nih buat menyibukkan diri besok.

these 2 days, i'm okay in daylight. but when the sun comes down, it's getting heavier, and when the time come for me to hit the bed, well, to be honest, this period is the worst. i have nothing else to think about but you. i miss your voice, your breath while you're sleeping.

hhhh. ik mis je schat :'(

padahal yaaaa tadi gw dapet pencerahan gitu.

"every second that passes without you draw me closer to when you will be back home, and it makes everything worthwhile.'

and it's not that heavy anymore, 'cause i know you'll be home quite soon :)

i've been writing you some letters, how sweet, ain't i? :p

it's just i have too much in mind about you and i don't to publish it quite so, so i decided to start writing again. it's been a while for me to not to write letters onto papers.

i'll show you when you come to my house, don't worry :)

i love you. i love you.

too much.

2010-01-24T01:43:00.004+07:00

i miss you too much.

i've waited the whole day to have you on the end of the line at the end of the day.

is it too much to ask for?

a handful of time from my own man?

24 hours seem not to be enough for you to play.

you live your life without me for most of the hours,

i only ask an hour or so of your life to be spent with me, is it too much?

i'm sorry if i can't understand you that much.

falling too deep.

2010-01-24T01:03:00.003+07:00

i really wish i could hate you by now.

my bones are shaking they want to rise up against me to hate you.

you have no time for me, but you think you do.

i only got your left-overs.

yeaaaaa, you've been busy and stuff, i know.

it's just you were soooooooooo excited about me calling you in the midnight,

but after you met your friend, it disappears.

i just checked on you for you hadn't reply my msg for almost an hour.

and the only thing i got is ' aku boleh main dulu? '

fcuk.

you are my #1. but me? for you?

again, this question appears.

when i look back, it seems like the more i love you, the less you care about me.

the less you care, you think about how i feel.

you're a free man, i know.

i'm not limiting you or what.

it's just, can you think of me, about how i would feel for a sec ?

i really wish.. but i just can't.

i think i love you too much.

i fall too deep.

great.

2010-01-12T21:44:00.004+07:00

the man i love THINK THAT I HATE HIM.

how could that be?

could this be any worse?

it was just a simple matter, but we both make it big.

we BOTH.

not only me, not only him.

why he was that stone-headed?

if he's always been like that, why do i not realize this?

i think about it for times, but i could only say that he's not that stoneheaded,

only in some matters.

oh yeah, and he's somewhat depressed and tired.

no wonder he's that sensitive.

..okay. my bad.

i'm the one who is lack of understanding, lack of caring.

i'm the one who keeps reasoning and don't want to understand what he's facing.

the one who doesn't want to understand that he's tired.

i'm such a bad girlfriend.

i really think that he needs someone a lot better than me, since i only give him more burden.

not a second i could make him happy.

too bad he got someone like me.

however, i wish that we would still be 'us'.

as long as we can be.

maybe you won't believe this - and it's kinda painful if you really don't, but,

i love you.

is this love?

2010-01-09T23:18:00.003+07:00

how could you say you love me when you still do what i hate most? you love me, but you torture me to death. is that love? maybe. 5 minutes ago from web

you know how much i hate it, but you stiill do it. have you ever think about how i might feel?10 minutes ago from web
somewhat it's torturing me. isn't all torturing enough for me, then you have to add some?20 minutes ago from web
at time like this.. i hate you.7 minutes ago from web
lemme explain the last tweet i wrote above.i hate you because you do things that you know i hate them most.i hate you because you don't understand how much those activity tortures me.i hate you because you had fun without me.i hate you because you're not listening to me.i hate you because by doing so, i feel like i'm not important enough for you.i hate you because i can't have you here by myside, but you looks like you're pretty much enjoying it.i hate you because when you do those thingy, i will be number-i-don't-know.i hate you because i love you too much, i can't be that firm to you.

sorry, i know i'm selfish.

the sweetest things.

2010-01-03T17:56:00.002+07:00

these are some of the sweetest things that he did to me at the year end :

1. ngebolang ke semarang tanpa tau apa2 tentang semarang, gatau jalan, dan harus nunggu gw di hotel sama nyokap dan ade2 gw karena gw belom pulang.

2. empet2an di mobil rame2, bahkan dari borobudur ke semarang :*

3. main dan berbaur dengan begitu cepat sama keluarga gw :*

4. pasang muka tertarik pas dikhotbahin bokap gw, jago banget ngambil hati bokap gw sampe bokap gw ngasih restunya :D

5. kontrol diri nya hebaaaatt banget :) :)

6. ikut gw ke gereja dan nginep cuma karna mau lama2 sama gw :D :* :*

7. beli tiket ke jakarta dari semarang trus baru ke bandung biar bisa taunbaruan sama gw, bahkan merelakan untuk tidak taunbaruan sama temen2nya - ini thanks to his mom juga, makasih banyak ya tanteee :D

8. nungguin lama di borobudur :*

9. pas gw lagi berdiri numpu di lutut gitu rada membungkuk gitu di puncak borobudur, dia nutupin leher gw pake tangannya dia biar leher gw ga kebakar aaaaailoveyou!

10. pas malem taun baru dia disuruh bokap gw foto2 fireworks, tapi dia bilang ke gw sebenernya males foto2, mau sama gw aja aaaawww :')

11. dia sebel pas jalan balik ke hotel trus katanya gw diliatin sama dapek2 yang disitu haha.

12. gw disebranginnya tuh bener2 di protect gituuuuu :')

ah masih banyak deh tapi gabisa diceritain hahaha gonna keep it for myself aja hihi,

iloveyou Omar Adrian Rozak! :D

happy new year 2010!

2010-01-01T21:59:00.002+07:00

post pertama tahun ini.

akhir taun 2009, gw mengalami beberapa hal yang menurut gw adalah mukjizat, somehow.

awalnya, terlihat ga mungkin buat gw bisa ketemu sama si pacar tahun ini, tapi gatau kenapa gw ga kehilangan harapan. gw terus berdoa dan mencoba mengembalikan iman gw yang udah lama menipis. ga mudah, memang.

berkali-kali gw dikasih secercah harapan, trus ga lama dihancurin lagi. latihan mental.

tapi itu memang sebenernya gw butuhkan, latihan mentalnya maksudnya. udah cukup lama gw hidup enak, dan itu bikin gw males keluar dr comfort zone gw.

singkat cerita, by some miracles, gw ketemu sama pacar. dia nyamperin gw ke semarang pas tanggal 29 desember kmrn. gw harap-harap cemas gitu soalnya bokap gw kaya rada ga setuju gimana gtu pas tau soal dia, trus kan gw ga dibolehin ke jogja. trus akhirnya setelah ngmg2 sama si pacar, dia berbaik hati mau nyamperin ke semarang :3 dan gw ijin bokap gw, boleh apa ngga si pacar nyamperin ke semarang. trus bokap gw bilang boleh, dia penasaran juga katanya -________- haha.

abis itu ternyata nyokap gw sama ade2 gw nyusul ke semarang tanggal 29 pagi, dan pas si pacar dtg ke hotel, adanya nyokap sama ade2 gw soalnya gw masih di gereja. ga sabar deh gw buat balik ke hotel, sampe akhirnya gw turun di lobby buru2 trus ga lama 'TING!' bunyi lift, gw nengok, and there he was :D

hhhh lega banget akhirnya bisa liat bentuk nya lagi. hihi.

abis itu kita makan rame2 gtu sama keluarga gw, trus balik ke hotel, ngobrol2. lebih tepatnay dia diceramahin bokap gw sih haha. gw cuma nemenin sambil tidur2an aja mainan hp gatau mau ngapain :p

singkat cerita, akhirnya dia nginep, sorenya ikut gw ke gereja, trus besok paginya pulang.

tanggal 31 rencana ke borobudur, akhirnya jadi :D

si pacar nyampe borobudur duluan dari jogja kan dia kan, gw dr semarang. trus jadi kmrn2 om nya meninggal, gw udah ngeri dia disuruh ke bandung gtu dan gabisa ketemu gw :p eh ternyata akhirnya dia dibolehin sama nyokapnya buat ke jakarta dari semarang, jadi dia bisa taun baruan di semarang sama gw, baru ke jakarta trus ke bandung :D makasih ya tanteee :DDD

pokoknya akhirnya ketemu dia di borobudur, yang ngliat duluan tuh ade gw si okki, gw ga liat tadinya haha trus abis itu foto2 rame2 sama keluarga gw, trus akhirnya gw, pacar, sama si okki naik sampe atas sampe puncaknya gitu, yang lain gamau karna itu hampir jam 12 siang dan gila emang mataharinya terik bgt haha.

ampe atas, diceritain soal borobudur sama si pacar, trus foto2 dikit, trus kepanasan turun lagi deh hehe. ketemu sama yang lain, jalan ke luar, naik kereta2an keliling komplek borobudur - ngadem sih tujuannya haha- trus makan es krim, trus baru ke parkiran.

balik ke semarang, mpet2an di mobil, innova diisi 11 orang tuh makin tepos deh gw duduk berjam2 haha tapi gpp deh sama pacar ini :D

sampe di hotel, gw diselingkuhin sama si pacar, dia selingkuh sama bokap gw sama SLR mereka masing2 -_______- akhirnya gw ke kamar sebelah trus ngobrol2 sama yang lain deh drpd gw cengo haha. seneng deh bokap gw yang tadinya dikira gw sama pacar gasuka sama si pacar, ternyata fine2 aja gitu dan bisa get along really well sama si pacar :D

trus maleman dikit, gw pacar dan okki makan lesehan di lorong hotel gara2 di kamar pada tidur, ga enak kalo makan di kamar kata si pacar yaudah deh kita nekat hahaha. seru loh, kapan lagi makan di lorong hotel? :p

abis makan si okki masuk kamar trus tidur, nyimpen tenaga buat malem taun baru trus gw sama pacar ngobrol2 di lorong lesehan gtu trus abis itu gw sama pacar ke kolam renang deh foto2 haha. trus kita bingung mau kemana, diusir gitu sama mas2 yang di kolam renang -_______- trus akhirnya main lift ke lt 11, niat mau liat penthouse nya cuma ngeri gtu krik2 akhirnya turun lagi deh, gw ngantuk soalnya, tidur2an di lorong hotel hahaha dapek bgt dah tidur2an di lorong hotel :p tapi kamar gw paling ujung gtu sih trus kaya huruf L gtu bentuknya lorongnya jadi ga ada yang liat haha.

jam 11 bokap gw bangun trus dia keluar kamar, tadinya mau pergi gitu taunbaruan rame2 di deket simpang lima yang ada fireworks party, tapi ternyata pada males capek katanya -_____- akhirnya cuma gw, pacar, okki, sama bokap yang keluar ke simpang lima yang rame banget banyak bgt motornya dan gitu doang gitu taun baruannya. ada fireworks sih, cuma tetep aja ga ada countdown ato apa gitu krik krik deh hahaha.

tapi ini pertama kalinya gw natalan dan taun baruan pas punya pacar hihi. seneng deh rasanya memulai tahun yang baru, detik2 awal hari pertama di tahun yang baru sama orang yang gw sayang banget :D taun depan lagi ya cay, ily :D

dia bilang taun depan gantian gw yang taunbaruan bareng keluarganya dia hahaa gw sih ayo2 aja, masalahnya diijinin ga? hahaha.

makasih ya pacaaar, udah ngebolang ke semarang padahal ga pernah ke semarang sama sekali dan akhirnya nyampe :D ga sia2 kan perjuanganmu? hihi. iloveyou :)

buat semuanya, semoga tahun ini lebih baik dari tahun2 sebelomnya yaaa, be a better person, guys! godbless :)

be strong baby, be strong.

2009-12-18T21:20:00.002+07:00

aku tau ini ga akan gampang buat kita ke depan, tapi percaya ya sayang, seberat apapun hari2 di depan, kita laluin bareng2. walopun kita jauh, inget sayang, kayak yang selalu kamu bilang, hati kita satu.

aku gatau kapan bisa ketemu kamu, aku bener2 gatau kapan. tapi kamu percaya ya, kita bisa laluin ini semua. semuanya ada waktunya buat kita bisa bareng2 nanti.

aku gabisa ngomong banyak, tapi gatau kenapa, aku ga hopeless, aku ga desperate, dan aku ngrasa something good is going to happen, idk when, idk what. i just.. know. again, my instinct.

sabar ya sayang, semua ada waktunya. semua ada saatnya.

be strong, and be tough.

together we will overcome this.

aku percaya sama kita.

aku sayang kamu.

aku cinta kamu.

big brother vs lil sister.

2009-12-13T17:17:00.010+07:00

the difference between my big brother and your little sister, from my perspective :

1. me and my brother talk a lot about you. i ask him for opinions and supports when i have any problem with you. do you?

2. me, i don't only have one brother. all member of the house is my brothers.

3. my brothers has nothing to do with my ex. esp, latest.

4. my brothers have never take your place.

5. my brothers never take the first chance of something in my life, foregoing you.

6. my brothers have never been somewhat directly annoying to you, right?

7. my brothers have never implied that they know me more or longer than you do, right?

8. they have never been mr.i-know everything-and-you-don't to you, am i right?

9. if you ask me to choose between you and them, i can decide. can you?

P.S. about the 5th, well actually, have i ever be the first in your life? the first to try on something yours? or simply, the first one, in just one thing in your life, without anyone have ever been in that position before? i'm dying to be something in your life. to be the first one of any thing, a simplest thing will be fine. maybe you can't understand this feeling. maybe you think that i'm stupid. let the thought be yours. because i can't help.

P.S.S. i'm sorry i'm turning into someone who is really easy to be jealous. well i think it's because i love you even more, and losing you is one thing i couldn't imagine, and i wouldn't stand it again, to lose someone i love. i already know how much it hurts, and i'm sure, i can't stand it.

P.S.S.S. i'm sorry, i know i want too much. i ask too much. if you can't stand me, i'll totally understand, but i can't promise you that i will live the next day. i love you, even in this despair of mine.

torture.

2009-12-13T05:38:00.003+07:00

it's quite hard to see you putting such a poisonic liquid into your body and i can do nothing about it. it's torturing me.

bener deh, percaya ga percaya, itu nyesek.

dan sekalinya udah bangun dan mikir, susah banget buat tidur. hhhhhhhh

weiseh.

2009-12-13T01:09:00.002+07:00

selama ini gw bego banget terbakar api cemburu hahahahaha sumpah deh ga penting bgt gw jelesnya, i would have won without putting any effort. AHUAHAHAHA sumpah, seneng :DDD dan lega hahaha. ga ada deh yang namanya nanti putting any effort buat jadi lebih. biasa aja cukup kok :D ahuahaahhaa diatas angin nih wus wusss hihiihi. menyenangkan sekali perasaan semacam ini. hahahaa. aduh seneng deeehh :D :D :D :D :D

maaf ya pacar, aku nyusahin banget dari kemaren jeles2 gitu, padahal agak ga penting sih sebenernya hahahaa. i love you :3

100th post.

2009-12-13T00:34:00.002+07:00

gw nulis sambil makan oreo cheese cake loh hahah asik deh tadi mampir ke secret recipe sebelom pulang trus beli. ngidaaaamm dari pagi gara2 liat pacar makan apatuh tadi, chocolate mousse? haha. ngidam ke2 yang kesampean hari ini. ngidam pertama ituuu good time teddy bear. kesampean td siang, dan pas gw gereja, jeng jeeeng banyak gtu ada di meja depan. gw makan sampe eneg. hhahaha.

as we go through our fights these few days, now i realize, that i really love you baby, and i really don't wanna lose you. and please, take good care of my heart, because it's getting even more fragile.

i love you, my boy :3

roller coaster ride.

2009-12-12T15:02:00.002+07:00

kayanya gw kebanyakan maunya deh.

skrg gw pngn bgt di jogja, bareng sama pacar, nemenin dia main sama temen2nya.

gw sirik deh sama orang yang bisa pacaran tiap hari, jalan - jalan tiap malem minggu. huaaahhh.

siriik :(

flame on! * chris evans style di fantastic four.

pengen aja bilang itu udah lama haha.

ini mood seharian udah kaya roller coaster. bentar bagus, bentar drop lagi to the lowest point. hhh. hancur nih kalo begini terus.

thankgod i have them.

2009-12-12T01:41:00.003+07:00

in this hard situation, i really have to say thanks to these people :

1. Prita - my superbestfriend :DD

2. Tian - my 8pm syndrome :DD

3. Kak Ase - my bigbrother who cares so much about me :)

4. Biyan - who is having some problems, but still willing to listen to my story ;)

i love you, guys!

getting heavier.

2009-12-12T01:14:00.003+07:00

why the burden is getting heavier and heavier?

i wanna cry, but i have no tears left.

i really think we should talk about these things.

how could we just ignore it?

things will be worse if we just ignore them.

we're dating.

we need communication.

not only shallow ones.

we need it deeper.

i have faith in you,

i believe we could overcome this.

don't be afraid.

it might be a bit worse for a moment,

but i promise,

our love will conquer all.

nothing bad will happen to us.

it will deepen our relationship.

i promise.

i love you. you know i do.

and now the puzzle completed.

2009-12-11T23:38:00.002+07:00

setelah menelfon tian, lengkaplah semua potongan puzzle yang tadinya masih berserakan.

potongan - potongan yang hilang sudah kutemukan, dan bahkan dilengkapi dan dipoles.

dunia memang sempit, sungguh.

ternyata orang itu, adalah orang yang juga dikenal oleh tian.

1 kampus. dan masih sama2 fisip. sungguh dunia itu sempit.

aku tak tau bagaimana menjelaskan rasa ini.

puas, bangga, sedih, cemburu, remuk, menjadi satu dengan imajinasi gilaku.

tak habis - habisnya ku bayangkan kejadian waktu itu,

dengan apa yang sudah aku dengerkan,

informasi - informasi yang sudah aku kumpulkan,

dan efeknya terhadapku.

aku tak menyangka, sungguh.

tetapi aku tak lagi terkejut.

aku mengambil resiko, dan aku bertanggung jawab atas apapun yang terjadi terhadap diriku.

aku tak akan menyalahkan siapa pun.

ini semua adalah efek dari keingintahuanku yang begitu besar.

kecintaanku padamu membuatku ingin mengetahui semua tentangmu.

mungkin aku terlahir sebagai penguntit.

atau mata - mata.

aku tak tahu.

aku hanya tahu, aku punya kemampuan ini,

kemampuan untuk menganalisa segala sesuatu,

sehingga aku menemukan apa yang aku ingin tahu.

ditambah dengan insting sekuat binatang buas,

yang terus aku asah.

aku tak menyalahkan siapa pun.

dan kau tak perlu berkomentar.

aku menulis ini,

semata - mata hanya karena aku ingin menulis.

aku hanya ingin meminta maaf,

andai saja sehabis hari ini,

perlakuanku padamu sedikit berubah.

apa daya,

manusia memang berubah,

selalu berubah.

kita tak akan bisa terus sama.

walaupun kita berharap untuk bisa selalu sama.

karena satu - satunya hal yang konstan di dunia ini adalah perubahan.

brainiac.

2009-12-11T23:05:00.002+07:00

emang deh, gw lebih pinter.

don't you realize, you just told me what last night you said about ' gamau sebut merk'

gotcha ;)

dan berat sih emang buat tau. berat banget. cuma mau gimana. i love risks. i live with it.

another misunderstanding.

2009-12-11T18:33:00.003+07:00

sepertinya ada yang harus kita selaraskan disini.

apa yang menurut kamu begitu, belum tentu menurut aku begitu.

tolong, jangan ada terlalu banyak salah paham di antara kita,

itu akan membunuhku.

terlalu banyak mengalah juga lelah, kau tahu?

jeritan hati.

2009-12-11T02:10:00.003+07:00

untuk yang tersayang.

suatu hari, pernah ada yang nanya sama aku, apakah aku bener2 kenal sama kamu sampe aku mau dan berani ngejalanin long distance sama kamu. aku gabisa jawab, karena emang kadang aku merasa ga bener - bener kenal sama kamu. masih banyak tentang kamu yang aku gatau. dan itu sering bikin aku sedih. bukannya aku ga percaya sama kamu, ini hal yang berbeda.

memang aku yang salah karena aku susah untuk bisa puas, karena terlalu banyak maunya, aku minta maaf.

aku sayang kamu, dan aku mau jadi bagian dalam hidup kamu. ga cuma di masa ini, tapi juga di masa depan. bagaimanapun, aku pengen tau lebih banyak soal masa lalu kamu. mungkin kamu merasa aku ga perlu tau semuanya, aku hanya cukup tau sebagian.

sebenernya aku mau tau karena masa lalu itu yang ngebentuk kamu jadi apa adanya kamu sekarang. aku mau tau semua soal kamu. gimana bisa aku ga kenal orang yang aku bilang aku sayang? aku gamau cuma kenal kamu beberapa lapisan luarnya, sayang.

kenapa aku bisa bilang begitu? karena sampai barusan pun, banyak kenyataan tentang masa lalu kamu yang membuat aku kaget.

atau jangan jangan, kamu ga cukup percaya sama aku? ga cukup untuk ngasih tau aku semua tentang kamu? :'(

aku mau tau semuanya, sayang. semuanya. aku mau kamu seutuhnya.

kalau boleh, kalau tidak terlalu banyak meminta.

aku sayang kamu.

saya memang bodoh.

2009-12-11T01:40:00.004+07:00

goblok. gw nanya sesuatu tanpa mikir panjang. sebenernya, gw belom siap. tapi yaudahlah, nasi udah keburu jadi bubur. my bad, emg bego sih gw nanyanya seenak jidat. huffffff.

ternyataa.. ini dia missing link nya. kenapa gw dari awal merasa ada sesuatu yang ga dikasih tau, merasa ada yang ga dia bilang, dan ada hubungannya sama seseorang yang belom lama dia kenalin ke gw. ternyata ini.

walopun ga bener2 berhubungan sama orang ini, tapi tetep ada hubungannya. darah bahkan. hfff.

kadang susah juga punya insting yang terlalu kuat. tapi gw bersyukur sih, jadi gw tau kalo ada yang ga dikasitau. hffff.

goblok emang deh gw.

ga mikir panjang nanyanya, padahal besok uas. uhuuu :'(

dan jujur, ini sedikit menurunkan semangat gw buat ke jogja. goblok emang gw. goblok goblok. so stupid i even curse my self eventho tomorrow is final exam and i need my confidence. hhhhh.

maaf ya pacar, gw nyalain laptop lagi, soalnya ga akan bisa tidur kalo belom ceritaaa. uhuu.

dan pacar, bukan kamu yang ga bikin aku seneng lagi, akunya aja yang goblok, nyari2 masalah sendiri, jangan merasa ini salah kamu ya. akunya aja yang nyari susah, karena terlalu penasaran. well, i'm born with this huge curiosity, who's to blame?

typoon? so what.

2009-12-08T00:29:00.003+07:00

i know these days were hard for us to go through,

but i believe that our love is stronger than these problems.

these problems are nothing.

i believe we will overcome this.

i trust you,

i have faith in us.

i love you.

..dan ketika

2009-12-08T00:27:00.001+07:00

#maliq & d'essentials

Ketika waktu tlah menciptakan cerita tentang kita
Mestinya semua indah kini yang terasa..

Sejujurnya kadang aku pun tak mengerti
Peran apa yang kita jalani
Seindahnya dunia ini takkan seindah
Bila ku milikimu dan ku milikmu..

Bila memang bukan kita yang tentukan
Kemana arah cinta ini kan membawa
Berikanlah aku satu jalanmu tuhan
Agar aku mengerti apa yang kita jalani..kini

Bilakah waktu tlah menentukan saatnya
Saat untuk bersama
Saat-saat kita jelang bahagia..

Percayalah sayang bukan aku tak sayang
Bila cinta tak mampu bertahan
Seindahnya cinta ini takkan seindah
Bila ku milikimu dan ku milikmu..

Tetaplah tersenyum
Yakinlah waktu kan tentukan saatnya

Aku denganmu..

sometimes, i wonder..

2009-11-28T19:20:00.003+07:00

i've been wondering, will our relationship turned out fine?

since it's a long-distance one, and we have sort of low intensity of communication.

we text quite some, but that's it.

at the beginning, i was optimistic because we often call each other. and we often chat and webcam-ing.

but lately, these past few weeks, since you were busy preparing your school event, i often feel left behind.

we text less, we rarely talk on the phone and even do the cam chat.

i have lots of things i wanna tell, that i want you to know, but you don't have enough time to listen to me.

and lately, when i call you, not so long, you fell asleep on the phone. great.

i know you're tired, but don't you dare to think that i'm not.

i put aside my exhaustion to have some conversation with you, to keep our relationship alive. i wait for you to come home eventhough i'm super-exhausted.

and what did you do? nothing.

i turned to be a moody person, and more sensitive. i know that isn't good. i'm sorry.

i can't help.

can we work this out together? because i think you don't have time for me that much again.

i miss you.

i do love you, but..

2009-11-28T17:44:00.002+07:00

my bad i've been moody these past few days.

but still, should i be the one who text first?

gabisa ya baik2in orang yang lagi bad mood? sigghhhh.

perfect.

2009-11-23T14:24:00.002+07:00

last trip to Jogja was perfect.

we fight, we made up, we laugh, and we love.

and i love him even more. i learned to trust him, to put my faith on him.

i give my heart for him to take care of, and i hope that he won't do any harm on it.

i trust you.

i love you.

cerita hari itu.

2009-11-23T14:13:00.004+07:00

ruanglah yang menjadi penghalang citramu,

sedikit ego menambah indahmu.

aku tidak mengalah,

tak akan pernah.

aku hanya menunggu menanti dalam biruku.

kita, oktober, Jogjakarta.

awan kan menuntun gadisku kembali ke pelukan.

menanti berharap asa tak'kan binasa.

aku sayang kamu.

-O.A.R. - september 27th, 2009.

ik mis je schat :'(

gonzfest09 :D

2009-11-17T00:51:00.002+07:00

it's almost 1AM but i'm still fully awake.

sabtu, 14 nov, gonzfest 09.

emang udah janjian sama anak2 mau dateng, mau reuni kecil2an :p

ga nyesel deh, panggungnya ok bgt, konsepnya keren, buat nggabungin semua acara di gonz jadi 1 acara yang gede banget dan sukses! congrats buat panitia gonzfest09 :)

banyak foto2 cuma gw males masukin deh haha.

menurut gw, best performance of the day itu barru likumahuwa project. paraaah ya, my body couldn't stop moving! hasek abis haha. mana saxophonistnya si dennis junio ok abis lagi haha bikin cewe2 pada heboh.

and my favorite, lagu yang 'mati saja' haha. ada kenangannya, dan gw emang cinta mati sama itu lagu haha. aduh kemana pun ada BLP, gw kejar deeh. haha.

yang paling penting sih ketemu anak2, udah kangen bangeeett hahah sayang ga terlalu banyak foto2.

and tomorrow, secara skrg udah hari selasa, i will meet my greatest boyfriend :DDD hihi. mudah2an dia bisa jemput deh. kangeeeennnn! ga sabar deh. hihi.

one of the best weekends i've ever had - day 4.

2009-11-12T21:53:00.002+07:00

telat banget sih secara udah mau 2 minggu, tapi kalo ga gw post agaknya gantung ga ada endingnya dari perjalanan gw ngebolang ke jogja. haha. here it is.

jadii hari terakhir, gw bangun pagi - padahal gatau baru tidur jam brp - dan tanpa cuci muka sikat gigi * i know, jorok. haha* dan cuma ganti baju, gw pergi sama si pacar sama Jordie. mereka mau tanding basket gitu deh. dan itu udah telat, soooo gw gacucimukasikatgigi deh hahaha.

GORnya jauh. dan nyampe sanaa.. siiiiiiiiiiiiiinnggggg.. sepi. -.- trus telf2 sana sini, ternyata mainnya jam 9. geblek.

dan karna belom pada sarapan, akhirnya si pacar minta Jordie nyetir ke mister burger terdekat. yaudah deh kita ke mister burger yang di sudirman trus mesen take away gitu. balik lagi deeh ke GOR.

nah pas nyampe GOR, ga lama mereka langsung main. gw duduk sendiri gitu sambil jagain barang2 titipannya si pacar sama Jordie di samping lapangan. pas gamenya udah mulai, ga lama dateng 2 cewe, duduk di sebelah kiri gw. gw ga ngerti mereka ngmg apa secara mereka ngmg bahasa jawa, tapi gw mendengar nama cowo gw disebut beberapa kali dengan antusiasnya sama mereka.

"....... omar .... omar! ..... omar ... blablabla "

ngek. gw pengen bilang 'mbak mbak, pacar saya kenapa ya? tolong ditranslate ke bahasa indonesia' haha.

ga lamaaa, dateng lah ibu2 berjilbab duduk di kanan gw. trus mereka juga melakukan hal yang sama, cuma ga terang2an nyebut nama si pacar sih. mereka nyebutnya sekolahnya si pacar. sebenernya ada 1 lagi ade kelasnya si pacar yang tanding, tapi dia duduk di bench soo i assumed, ga mungkin tu bocah yang diomongin. hahaha.

gw langsung mikir 'buset deh cowo gw eksis banget apa ya ampe kiri kanan gw ngomongin gitu -________- '

haha akhirnya abis game, gw balik trus beres2 trus langsung ke airport. ga mandi, cuma cuci muka dan sikat gigi doang haha.

nyampe airport jam 11.15an gitu, padahal flight gw 11.40.

si pacar ampe bilang ' kamu bukannya mestinya buru buru ya?'

hahaha gw si santai ajaaa. gw cuma jawab ' santai lah. masi ada flight berikutnya ini. ' hahaha

akhirnya gw meluk si pacar sebelom masuk, trus check in dan gw ga sempet keluar lagi, ngeri juga, dan airportnya rame banget gitu jadi males deh gw kalo ampe lari2 nanti haha yaudah deh gw bayar airport tax - yang mana lebih murah dari jakarta, cuma 25rb - trus ke ruang tunggu nya. gw liat2 foto di kamera bentar, trus dipanggil.

boarding, di pesawat pesawatnya panaaas. buset deh kaya di angkot. gw ampe mikir ' apa bedanya naik angkot sama pesawat dah ACnya ga dinyalain'

trus udah gituuu lamaaa banget gitu gara2 nungguin orang lain, stngah jam an tuh nunggunya. tau gituuuu gw keluar lagi deeeeehh kan yaaaaa.

dan rasanya beraaat banget ninggalin jogja, belom apa2 gw udah kangen setengah mati sama si pacar ;p

pas nyampe jakarta, gw kan naik xtrans ke serpong, tapi itu nunggunya lamaaaa banget. mana pulsa gw abis. akhirnya gw keliling airport nyariin atm bca, mau isi pulsa. ketemu di terminal 1A yang keberangkatan, eeeeh lagi dibenerin. disuruh nunggu 15 menit. ga betah gw. gw jalan deh ke terminal 1B. disitu atm nya ngantri. tapi yaudahlah drpd nunggu 15 menit.

absi isi pulsa, ga lama akhirnya mobil xtansnya dateng trus yaudah deh. tapi rame banget gitu ga enak. trus gw ditelfon bokap. ga ada serangan panik soalnya gw udah di jakarta haha gw bilang aja lagi mau ke kostan temen ;p sorry daddy.

trus ampe gading serpong gw berenti, tadinya mau naik angkot, cuma gw bawa si junior, teddy bear yang dikasih si pacar yang gede banget, jadi gw males. akhirnya gw naik taksi. trus ngobrol2 sama supir taksinya haha.

pas nyampe kost, gw nangis gara2 ga kuat nahan kangen. nyiksa bangeeetngetngeeeeetttt. gile. abis itu gw langsung mikirin kapan gw bisa ke jogja lagi. dan pilihan yang gw punya adalah bulan ini, dalam bbrp minggu ke depan, atau taun depan. gila aja kalo taun depan. haha.

dan setelah perjuangan yang panjang, mikir - nabung - bujukin gita, akhirnya rabu depan gw akan ke jogja lagi sama gita :DDDD lama deh nih dari rabu sampe minggu hihihi seneng deeh, can't wait!

one of the best weekends i've ever had - day 3.

2009-11-07T16:21:00.002+07:00

eh gw di rumah loh :D gini kek, kan enak mau jungkirbalik gimana pun internetnya ga akan ilang kaya di kost. dan gw udah di beliin modem gitu sama bokap jadi bisa ol dimanapun deh mulai skrg haha thanks daddy :D

okay. hari ke 3 gw di jogja, which was Saturday! hihi.

gw bangun pagi gara2 si pacar mau sekolah, trus gatau mau ngapain, gw ke kamarnya tian yang ternyata ga dikunci. trus gw bangunin, tv ny dia nyala dari smlm, trus pagi2 buta jam stngah 7 mau jam 7 gtu udah ada infotainment aja deh iwaw. si tian girang gitu buka mata udah ada gossip haha yaampun. trus gw crta2 saam tian, tidur2an, ntn tv stngah2, trus di tau2 gw inget kayanya gw belom ngasi tau siapa gtu ya kalo gw ke jogja. trus gw keinget si valen. trus tdny gw udah ngetik sms, udah mau gw send pula, trus gw mikir 'ih ngapain. kmrn abis ky gtu. kebagusan amat.' yaudah akhirnya gw ganti jadi sms boni. trus setelah smsan bbrp kali, si boni yang adalah temen sekelasnya valen blg gni di sms : 'kata valen 'tuuh.. ga inget2 temen..' trus gw bacanya 'LOH. kmrn mendadak nyolot, dibaikin nglunjak, skrg ga dikasitau gw ke jogja malah ky gtu. apabanget deh ih.' trus abis itu gw jelasin deh ke boni sekilas permasalahan waktu si valen ke jakarta dan sesudahnya. dan kata boni 'haha emang gitu ken orangnya, maklumin aja' iiiiihhh apa banget. trus akhirnya gw sms deh si valen 'val aku di jogja loh ;p' sambil masih smsan sama boni. eh tau2 si boni bilang si valen ga ada pulsa jadi gabisa bales sms -______________-

trus akhirnya jam 9an gw sama tian mandi, pas beres kita berangkat ke kostannya anton di blkg ugm situ deh. ternyata anton sekost sama vino juga, dan disana udah ada djaja dan pri. trus gw ntn tv ngobrol2, trus kita mikir gimana kalo mau kemana2 soalnya motornya kurang, akhirnya kita iseng ngajak stupa abi sama osa gituu para geng hukum haha dan luckily, stupa sama abi lagi di jalan naik mobil. yaoloh gw seneng bgt sumpah soalnya siang2 di jogja panasnyaaaaa yaaulooh neraka bocor deh. trus nungguin abi sama stupa dtg, gw ol pake laptopnya vino. teruuss yaudah deh pas mrk dateng, kita makan gitu, kalo kata gita sih dia dkk biasa manggilnya ayam penyet bubo, soalnya yang jualan ibu2 kribo haha tapi juga dikenal dengan nama 'pitik gejrot'. itu enak gitu ayamnya milih sndri, nasinya ngambil sndri, trus cabenya milih gtu mau berapa, trus dibikin sambel, diulek seayam2nya. ga kebayang? coba sendiri deh. hahaha. enak sumpah. gw cuma pake cabe 3, soalnya gamau soktau, takutnya kalo gw pake banyak2 taunya kepedesan trus gabisa dimakan kan sayang kan? haha. sebelom gw ada mbak2 pake cabe 10 masa -____- gw shock dengernya.

abis dari situ, gw anton vino djaja tian ke empire nonton cloudy with a chance of meatballs yeay :D sebenernya ada perjuangannya juga mau ntn, secara motornya kurang, tapi skip aja deh males nulisnya haha.

trus abis ituuu, gw dijemput di empire sama si pacar. abisnya empire ada razia gitu, trus padahal si pacar ga punya sim -___- trus dia bilang santai aja yaudah deh gw penasaran kan gimana lewatinnya, trus tau2 dia masuk gang gitu aja deh hahaha geblek, lolos deh dengan mudahnya -___-

abis ituuu kan niatnya emang sabtu tuh gw dan si pacar mau pacaran aja gitu ya di rumahnya dia, eeh pas kita sampe rumahnya, rumahnya rame gitu ada kakaknya beserta pacar dan teman2nya. yaudah deh akhirnya kita menginvasi dapur, trus gw ngabisin mangga 1 mangkok gede banget huahahahaha. trus kita liat2 katalog sekolah cowo gw - john de britto - trus foto2. trus dia dipanggil gitu nyokapnya pulang trus dia bantuin bawa barang gitu kan. trus gw cengo di dapur cuma ngbolakbalik katalog. trus ga lama nyokapnya lewat nanya apaaa gitu ya gw lupa hahaha. trus yaudah deh gw nunggu dengan cengo sampe akhirnya pacar gw kembali duduk. ehee. trus ga lama si pacar mandi, mau gathering clothing line nya dia soalnya dan gw harus ikut hahaha. janjian jam 4 gitu di mister burger, di sepanjang jalan gw iseng foto2 haha dan pas kita nyampe sana tuh udah jam 4 lewat, dan ga ada gitu temen2nya si pacar -_______-

si pacar mesen mister beef sama blackcurrant tea gitu, gw mesen onion ring doang sama milo. trus dateng si harris, kita ke atas duluan ga lama harris nyusul. trus yaudah deh kenalan trus udah mereka mulai ngomong bahasa jawa dan gw ga ngerti apa2 jadi gw celingukan doang kaya orang bego. trus next dateng rio, trus chibi. trus mereka ngbahas soal clothing line nya itu deh dan yaudah gw bingung mau ngapain haha. berusaha mencerna tapi ga gitu ngerti juga akhirnya yaudahdeh haha.

si chibi itu gayanya asik banget deh, trus gambar2nya lucu2 banget hahaha. dan dia gatau kenapa pengen banget motoin gw sama si pacar katanya -.-

truus abis dari mister burger, gw sama si pacar cabut keee gatau daerah mana sepertinya kaliurang soalnya deket rumahnya tian, ke hani's gitu, tempatnya baguuuusss, trus kesana take away makanan buat nyokapnya si pacar. trus balik deh ke rumahnya si pacar, ngasih makanannya si tantee. trus tadinya kita mau makan di hani's juga gitu, tapi ada lah tuh si pacar mesti ngumpul gitu sama temen2nya jadi yaudahdeh.

kita ke amplas, trus langsung ke foodcourt soalnya di sms bilangnya ngumpulnya di ambarukmo foodcourt, nah kok ga ada orang, akhirnya gw sama pacar muter2 ampals deh nyari boneka, tapi ga ada yang seru bonekanya, trus lewat giordano, si pacar nanya gitu jadi mau beli baju kembaran ga, gw blg jadi, trus masuk deh kita liat2, akhirnya beli gitu kaos warna ijo, polos sih, tapi samaan hihi lucu deh warnanya. truuss abis keluar dari giordano, di koridornya tuh rame banget gitu, gw jalan duluan kan lepas dr si pacar, trus gw abis ketawa apa ya jadi gw masih nyengir gitu deh, trus pas si pacar nyusul, dia ketawa2 gitu, pas gw tanya kenapa, dia blg jadi td 2 cewe yang pas2an sama gw bilang muka gw nyolot -___________- yaoloh, lagi nyengir aja dibilang nyolot. apalagi beneran gw nyolotin. bisa nangis kali mereka ya. ckck.

trus ternyata yaaaa ngumpulnya itu bukan di mall nya, tapi di seberangnya dan ternyata namanay itu food park -________- yaampun Jordie, lain kali kalo kasih info tuh yang bener dong ah haha. trus yaudah dengan perjuangan karena si pacar jg gatau tepatnya tempatnya itu dimana, kesanalah kita. pas nyampe baru ada Jordie Rimang sama Winda, dan itu udah jauh dari jam 7. gila ya ngaretnya poooll. haha. ga lama2 abis itu abis ngabisin minum, gw sama pacar cabut deh gara2 masih mau nyari boneka dan mau makan.

trus di jalan ada tokok namanya rumah pernik, dari luar keliatan banget bonekanya ajib2 haha abis itu si pacar nawarin mau nyari disitu apa ngga trus gw ya ayo2 aja lah. dan langsung deh ke tempat teddy bear, gw nunjuk yang paling gede, dan kata si pacar boleh. yaudah hhahaha trus gw sempet bingung milih warna, akhirnya gw pilih yang warna coklat agak tua gitu deh. abis itu yaudah kita tadinya mau makan di hani's itu kaan, tp gajadi gara2 satu dan lain hal haha padahal tempatnya bagus deh, pas sore2nya si pacar udah bilang gitu 'tar malem kita candlelight dinner ya' eeeh gajadi haha yaudah deh.

si pacar udah laper banget gitu kan, akhirnya gw menawarkan makan nasi goreng bakar gitu yang ga gitu jauh dan gw dr kmrn penasaran mau nyoba haha. trus akhirnya gw nyoba deh hahaha noh nasi goreng bertekanan haha aneh banget. enak sih hehe. truss abis itu tadinya kita mau ketemu sama thessa, tapi ngambil barang gw dulu di hotel. trus ujung2nya gajadi ketemu gitu gara2 udah malem, si thessa udah masuk. truuss yaudah deh gw balik ke rumah si pacar, nginep disitu hehe.

skrg si pacar lagi makrab, gabisa smsan deehh, dia lagi outbond gitchuuuu uhuu.

link foto tar yaa barengan sama post soal hari terakhir hehe.

one of the best weekends i've ever had - day 2.

2009-11-05T23:13:00.002+07:00

hari ke2, gw yang baru tidur jam 4, kebangun jam 8an, bales sms, trus tdr lagi. jam 9 kebangun gara2 djaja nyetel dashyat -____________- trus yaudah deh leha2 dulu, ngata2in orang di dashyat, nonton infotainment, sebelom akhirnya mandi dan siap2 pergi. bingung juga kmrn mau kemana, makanya jadi leha2 doang. sama bingung kurang helm 1 biji, ya masa iya gw beli? haha. trus abis mandii, dapet deh helm, dipinjemin sama bu le' nya tiaann hehe thanks tanteee :)

siang2, kelaperan, cabut lah kita ke yogyachicken. biihhh. hahaha. gw takjub sama makanan2 di jogja. murahnya ajib. gw kmrn makan 7rb itu udah nasi + dada ayam + es teh manis. di jakarta maan dapet. gw makan di kantin biru yang kantin karyawan di bawah supermall karawaci juga 6rb tuh udah murah bgt, ttp tanpa minum. hahaha. gw kebakar, baru ngerasain yang namanya neraka beneran bocor. sumpaaah panasnya tuh ga enak, nyengat banget. item seketika deh gw, terbukti dari belang di kaki gw yang tambah parah di bagian sandal jepitnya haha. cepet bgt sih pigmen gw hadoohh.

trus abis dr jogchick, bingung mau kemana. dan karena panas banget, gw minta ke amplas a.k.a ambarrukmo plaza. hahaha. gaya abis, jauh2 ke jogja tetep aja mainannya di mall -.- truus tdny mau ntn, cuma ga keburu gara2 tian mau les vokal jam 3, dunde juga mau makrab jam 3. mau ntn cloudy with a chance of meatballs, tapi adanya di empire *taunya hasil nyolong wifi plus minjem macbook di emax ahahaha*

trus akhirnya gw minta ke carefour, aus banget. beli minum deh kitaaa, itu gw tian djaja dunde. trus tadinya mau beli mangga, udah di depan tempat mangga harum manis, kita malah ngobrol disitu trus abis itu ngantri kasir. lupa beli mangga. geblek. hahaha. trus abis itu diajak djaja dia pengen makan es durian mendem di depan moviebox gejayan. yaudah deh kita kesanaaa, kebut2an di jalan, si djaja ga keterima kalo motornya kesusul dunde. tolol abis hahaha.

setelah perjuangan yang panjang, sampelah kita di tempat es durian mendemnya. BEH. GA RUGI. duriannya pooooll, daging nya banyak gitu, diminum sama susu coklat dingin gitu. beeeeehhh enak banget. buat yang doyan duren, mseti kudu wajib nyoba ini. harganya berapa ya 13ribu apa ya. itu gw makan ber3 sama djaja dan tian aja udah kenyang banget. si dunde ga ikutan gara2 mau makrab, dia mau siap2 gitu. naah kita makan disana, ngadem di bawah pohon sambil nungguin pacar gw pulang dan mandi, janjiannya disana gichuuuu hehe.

ga lama pacar gw tersayang nyampee, trus gw djaja tian nyelesein makan, trus akhirnya kita berpisah hehe. si djaja nganterin tian les vokal, gw sm si pacar mau ke frappio, si pacar minta dibatuin nyelesein pr english -____- haha. trus ke rumahnya si pacar dulu kan mau ngambil pr nya, eeeh sumpah rumahnya pw banget, jadi males kemana2 lagi haha. trus waktu si pacar ngerjain pr, gw baca cosmogirl apa ya tuh haha trus yaudah kita foto2 deh hihi.

bosen baca majalah, gw minjem laptop buat ol ;p trus ga lama nyokapnya si pacar pulang, kenalan lah kita, dimana gw merasa goblok banget dan sangat tidak sopan. trus yaudaah, balik ol lagi. ga lamaaa kakaknya si pacar pulang. dan dia cerita gitu kan sama si pacar, kocak abis deh ekspresif banget mukanya hahaha.

skip ah trus intinya gw laper, mau makan tapi ngantuk. akhirnya tidur2an dulu sampe beneran tidur. gw laper jam 5, br brgkt makan jam stnga 8an apa tuh ya. trus si pacar ganti baju gitu jadi rapih, gw cuma clna pendekan sama pake baju kupu2, kebanting banget. akhirnya gw minta balik ke hotelnya tian, cuci muka dan ganti baju hehe. trus tadinya kita mau makan di viavia, gw gatau itu dimana haha. tapi batal gara2 si pacar bilang males ketemu temen2 nyokapnya disitu daaan dia mendadak pengen sushi. jadi deh kita ke silla, tempatnya di ringroad utara, bener kan mbul? haha.

trus abis makan, tadinay kita mau ke bukit bintang, trus si pacar udah nanya2 jordie gitu, eeeeh udah sampe jalan wonosari, gajadi. muter balik deh. ke frappio. deziiiinggggg -.- haha gpp kok sayang :) besok2 kalo gw ke jogja pokoknya mauuuu ke bukit bintang. uhuuuu

yaudah abis itu kita ke frappio, gw mesen vanilla latte, si pacar mesen vanilla cookies shake, yang mana enaaaak banget duh gw jadi pengen kan nih. trus kita ol, udah bosen, trus si pacar mengambil alih laptop kembali dan dia buka omegle. ohmeeenn ada yg geblek banget *pacar gw ga kalah tolol sihh hahaha* setiap orang ditanyain gitu sama dia "alien?" hahah hasilnya menakjubkan. ketawa2 dah di frappio, padahal tadinya si pacar udah ngantuk, udah sempet merem segala haha.

trus si pacar terlalu ngantuk buat nganterin gw pulang ke hotel tian yang jauh baru pulang ke rumah dia. dia minta nginep. yaudah gw ijin tian, kata tian gpp nginep aja di hotelnya dia juga jadi yaudahdeeeeh kita balik ke rumahnya yang deket bgt sama frappio, balikin mobil, nuker jadi motor, ngambil2 barang, dll. kan nyokapnya baru pulang gitu kan, masa yaaa kita dikira berantem gara2 bedirinya jauh2an yaolooooh si tante, masa iya si pacar lagi siap2 ngambilin barang dikintilin? hahaha. abis itu yaudah deh cabut ke hotelnay tian, gw tidur di motor hahah dan kata si pacar, dapet lampu ijo terus masa di lampu merah. iwaaaww. hihi.

trus yaudah deh, nyampe, beres2, tidur.

dan gw baru berasa capek nih skrg abis tanding. sambung lagi besok yaaaa hari k3 dan k4 nya hihi :) toodles!

fly with me - jonas brothers.

2009-11-05T23:06:00.002+07:00

If time were still

The sun would never never find us

We could light up

The sky, tonight

I would see the world through your eyes

And leave it all behind

If it's you and me forever

If it's you and me right now

That'd be alright

Be alright

If we chase the stars to lose our shadow

Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine

So, won't you fly with me

Oh yeah

Gonna fly with me now

Now the past

Has come alive

And gave it meaning

And a reason

To give all I can

To believe once again

If it's you and me forever

If it's you and me right now

That'd be alright

Be alright

If we chase the stars to lose our shadow

Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine

So won't you fly with me

Maybe you were just afraid

Knowing you were miles away

From a place where you needed to be

And you are right here with me

It's you and me forever

If it's You and me right now

That'd be alright

If we chase the stars to lose our shadow

Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine

So won't you fly with me

If it's you and me forever

If it's you and me right now

That'd be alright

Be alright

If we chase the stars to lose our shadow

Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine

Won't you fly

Fly

Fly with me

one of the best weekends i've ever had - day 1.

2009-11-04T20:20:00.003+07:00

setelah pertimbangan, usaha dan perjuangan yang begitu lama, disertai keringat dan air mata *agak lebay sih, tapi beneran hahaha* akhirnya gw berangkat ke jogja tanggal 29 oktober untuk menemui pacar. haha.

mesti tau yaaa, gw dari karawaci naik angkot, pake nyasar segala, sampe gading serpong, trus ampe serpong naik angkot lagii, kelewatan dikiiiitt, trus naik ojek, trus baru deh sampe ke toko kue soes merdeka yang ada xtransnya buat berangkat ke airport.

setelah duduk di mobil travelnya xtrans, baru deeeh gw legaaa. perjuangan banget deh tuh ngubek2 serpong dan GS padahal buta jalan. modal nekat. hahaha. gw deg2an setengah mati tuh dari bbrp hari sblm brgkt, was2 gimana brgktnya gara2 cuma modal nekat. haha.

yak akhirnya sampelah gw di airport jam 4 sore, padahal pesawat gw jam 6 -___________- dan gw akhirnya nunggu sendiriaan, bermodal novel godfather a.k.a buku perang gw, ngabisin waktu nungguin boarding time. akhirnya boarding daaaaannnn... heavy traffic. sial. nunggu lama di pesawat deh jadinyaaa padahal udah ga sabar mau ke jogja. siauuulll.

akhirnya nyampe jogja ngaret 15 menitan apa tuh ya, gw tidur hampir sepanjang perjalanan gara2 ngantuk abis baca novel dan gatau mau ngapain lagi ahaha.

trus turun pesawat, gw buru2 keluar, dr jauh dengan softlens gw yang rada burem gara2 kayanya minus gw nambah, gw bisa melihat ada 1 kepala yang mencuat di antara kerumunan orang2 yang ngejemput. dan itu adalah pacar gw. hahaha. sangat mudah ditemukan.

trus gw jalan buru2, ketemu pacar, trus jalan ke parkiran yang jauuuuhh banget sambil verita2. hihi.

abis ituuu kita mampir bentar ke maharani, itu si saktya ulangtaun trus tadinya gw juga diundang cuma kita udah plan mau makan di nanamia jadi kesana cuma nyetor muka deh haha. gila kalo lama2 disitu, paru2 gw bisa copot. itu cerobong kereta masih kalah asepnya, ga lebay deh. abis darisituuuu cabut ke nanamia, lucu gitu konsepnya kaya resto pizza traditional italy gitu, masih pake tungku, dan dapurnya di depan. hehe. disituu pacar gw dengan gampangnya ngabisin 1 pan pizza yang large, alone. ckck. kenapa cowo bisa kuat banget makan? gw cuma makan fettucini carbonara dan itu udah kenyang banget.

trus abis makan bingung mau kemana, akhirnya gw diajak ke moviebox, yang gw emang pengen kesana karena penasaran sama konsepnya yang kaya home theatre gtu dan lo bisa milih sndri filmnya, ga beda sama ntn dvd di rumah sih. hahaha.

abis dari situuu, baru deh gw ke hotelnya tian, nyarinya pake nyasar lagi malem2 hahaha. akhirnyaaaa ketemu deh hotelnya tian, disana udah ada tian djaja dan dunde yang sedang menunggu, trus kita ngobrol2 bentar, ga lama disuruh nyokapnya tian pindah ke atas aja ngobrolnya, ga enak sama tamu yang lain kita berisik banget soalnya hahaha maklumlah ya udah lama ga ketemu, mana ada djaja pula yang bacotnya ga ada abisnya hahaha ampun dja.

trus kita lanjut di atas, ga lama pacar gw pulang soalnya besoknya masuk sekolah. yaudah gw nganter dia ke bawah trus naik lagi ngobrol2 lagi. trus akhirnya pindah ke kamar, trus si djaja sama dunde yang tadinya tidur di ruang keluarga jadi disuruh ikutan masuk kamar, padahal gw lg cerita sm tian dan lagi baru mau klimax, ketunda deh -.-

trusss gw crta2 lah sama tian sampe jam 4 pagi trus memutuskan untuk tidur haha.

oiyaaa jam stngah 4 pagi, ada yang nelf gtu ke gw, salah sambung -________- dia mau nyari ujang, mau nganter buncis katanya, mana logatnya sunda abis. gw ga tahan mau ketawa hahaha.

abis gw matiin telfnya, dia telf lagi masaaa, trus tian yang ngangkat, gw sama tian gabisa nahan ketawa sampe akhirnya dimarahin sama yang nelfon hahahah maaf2 aja ya pak hihi.

hari pertama dulu ya, gw mau tidur nih, nanti mau tanding basket. refill tenaga dulu bntr hehehe. bakal gw update buat hari selanjutnya soon! :))

27.10.09

2009-10-27T20:54:00.002+07:00

hari iniiiii..

1. gw sebulanan sama pacar. eheee. ga berasa deh tau2 udah sebulan aja hehe mungkin karena jauh kali yaaaa ;p

2. gw 18 taun 1 bulan. what so special?

gw dikasih surprise sama sahabat gw dan temen2 terdekat gw ihiiiiyyy hihi seneng deh.

ga kecium sama sekali, jago bgt mereka bikinnya. kamera gw dipinjem, trus rame2 ke bawah, tau2 ketemu gita, trus dipanggil, disodorin blueberry muffin dg lilin 18 di atasnya hahah make a wish, blew the candles, dikasi kado, foto2, dikasih kertas yang dibentuk hati sama gita hehehe.

gw baru buka kadonya di kost, isinya *jengjengjengjeeeeeeng* boneka gajaaaaah aaaaw lucu bangeeeettt hehe makasih yaa guys * gita cg marsha livia amy diska mirza, i love you guys :D*

sama ada kartu ucapan dari gita sama diska, trus kertas yang isinya tandatangan anak2 sekelas*well,hampir hehe* dan tulisan2 yang berbau premanisme -_______- hahah gw ngakak bacanya.

today was fun! sebenernya beberapa hari terakhir sih eheehe kmrn juga abis pergi sama cg marsha livia vita gevi mirza kak hinchen kak ray kak stevie kak christian pergi makan malem gtuu heheh.

selamat satu bulan, mi payaso! muaah :* ily.

life is being unfriendly to me lately.

2009-10-15T21:36:00.003+07:00

i got some bad scores for midtests.

i skipped the management midtest.

i have this thought about going to my bf's city but everything is unsure. i hate uncertainty.

i got some problems with my confidence lately idk why.

i got some problems with some of my new friends. i don't really care actually, but it makes things worse.

and last but not least,

i have this stupid little mood of hurting myself.

and everything is driving me crazy.

today is like the peak of the stress i'm feeling,

and because of one and other things,

i can't take it any longer.

and at that time, i feel that i have no one.

i feel this empty loneliness.

and that made me cry even more.

now while i'm writing this, my tears are still dropping.

bengkak deh mata besok palingan.

maaf.

2009-10-15T20:55:00.002+07:00

jadi apa itu arti kata maaf?

dengan semudah itu terucap.

hanya untuk menutupi kesalahan.

kau pikir akan cukup?

hati sudah terlanjur tergores. perih.

dan lalu.

'maaf'

sabar..

2009-10-13T09:59:00.000+07:00

Setiap tindakan – pasti membutuhkan sepenggal waktu tenggang antara pelaksanaan dan hasilnya. Sikap yang diperlukan untuk berlaku tenang dalam tenggang waktu itu adalah kekuatan yang biasanya kita sebut sebagai kesabaran. Itu sebabnya setiap tindakan membutuhkan kesabaran untuk sampai pada saat di mana hasil itu tercapai.
– Mario Teguh -

Kesabaran adalah kekuatan untuk berlaku tenang dalam penantian. Itu berarti, siapapun yang bisa bersabar, haruslah dia yang mengetahui dengan jelas apa yang sedang ditunggunya. Dan untuk mengetahui apa yang ditunggunya, dia harus melakukan sesuatu dengan rencana untuk mencapai satu atau dua hal tertentu.
– Mario Teguh -

;pp

2009-10-12T20:49:00.001+07:00

October 12 at 7:42pm

ketika kita dibuat, ajal disisipkan diantara sela-sela tulang rusuk kita
tidak banyak waktu yang kita habiskan bersama
tidak banyak waktu yang kita habiskan di dunia
tidak, bukan ajal yang menghentikan segalanya

seperti berjalan beriiringan dengan bayangan
lepas darimu adalah mustahil
belenggu yang indah dimana tidak ada yang ingin keluar darinya
dan kau menjawab semua pertanyaan :
Ya. Inilah cinta.

ily.
Omar.

aaw banget ga sih ni cowo gw? ;p

:DD

2009-10-09T22:00:00.003+07:00

from :

mi payaso :)

09.10.2009

10:37 AM

" keindahan adalah apa yang menarik jiwa, kepadanya cinta diberikan dan bukan diminta "

-Kahlil Gibran

ily :)

for you, men.

2009-10-09T08:57:00.003+07:00

stress ngerjain uts econ, trus dapet ini hehe.

1. Don’t hug her friends or your friends that are girls cause she’ll feel left out.

2. Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if it’s just for a second.

3. Hug her from behind.

4. Leave her voice messages to wake up.

5. Wrestle with her.

6. Don’t go hang out with your ex when shes not with you, you might not realize how badly it hurts her.

7. If you’re talking to another girl, when you’re done talking, walk over and hug her and kiss her…. let her know she’s yours and they aren’t.

8. Write her notes or call her just to say “hi”..and not just at night after you’ve already been out with other girls.

9. Introduce her to your friends . . . as your girlfriend.

10. Play with her hair.

11. Pick her up.

12. Get upset if another guy touches her and she doesn’t like it.

13. Make her laugh, if you can make her laugh, you can make her do anything.

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms.

15. If she’s mad at you, kiss her.

16. If you care about her, then tell her.

17. Every guy should give their girl 3 things: a stuffed animal(she’ll hug it every time she goes to sleep), jewelry (she’ll treasure it forever), and one of his t-shirts (she’ll most likely wear it to bed).

18. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when you’re alone.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile.

20. Hang out with her on weekends.

21. Kiss her in the rain.

22. If your listening to music, let her listen too.

23. Remember her birthday and get her something, even if it’s simple and inexpensive, it came from YOU. it means all the world to HER. it’s the thought that counts.

24. When she gives you a present on your birthday, or just whenever, take it and tell her you love it, even if you don’t (it’ll make her happy.)

25. Girl don’t necessarily have to have hour-long conversations every night, but it’s nice for them to hear your voice even for a quick hello.

26. Give her what she wants.

27. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most.

28. Tell her she’s beautiful, she needs to know her striving is working.

29. Hang out with her whenever you are free and u should be free to hang with your girlfriend all the time.

30. If u care about her…SHOW it!

tired of freakin assignments.

2009-10-03T22:31:00.005+07:00

harusnya gw ngerjain LCS nih. tapi gw bingung. mandek pol. trussss jadi blogwalking trus pengen masukin foto2 di kota tua deh hehe baru di upload juga sama valen wkwk. thanks ya val :) dia bilang besok mau dipilih2in lagi yang bagus jadi mungkin nambah lagi hihi.

acil - omar - niken

omar - niken - valen

omar - acil - niken

dibonceng loh :DD gw gabisa naik sepeda soalnyaaa hehe :p

kaya anak kecil, pendek gtu keliatannya ya. omar nih gimana sih ketinggian kamuuuu hehe

this one is my boy's fave. ahaha.

oiya ituuu ada foto si pacar di atas hehe :p

still have lots of assignments to do, toodles!

for you, women.

2009-10-02T19:53:00.000+07:00

repost from cherry's note.

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.

If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.

Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour. Allow your intuition(or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.
Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.
He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god.

He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else's man.

If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship
consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.

Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted. -Isn't this TRUE!!!!!

Never move into his mother's house.

Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.* Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Share this with other women... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another prepare.
Oprah Winfrey.

2009-09-30T01:11:00.003+07:00

gw barusan chat sama sastra, crta2 gtu kaan *padahal tabiatnya dari kelas 1 ceng2an sampe sering gw block gtu msnnya hahah. pas udah kuliah jadi akur -______-

trus dia blg gni :

"kalo kata nazareth ya

Love hurts, love scars,

Love wounds, and marks,

Any heart, not tough,

Or strong, enough

To take a lot of pain,

Take a lot of pain

Love is like a cloud

Holds a lot of rain

Love hurts, ooh ooh love hurts"

gw suka deh kata2nya :)

birthday blast!

2009-09-28T19:54:00.002+07:00

yesterday was my 18th birthday.

kronologisnya :

12 : 57, bahkan di jam gw belom tanggal 27, si pierre udah nelfon ngucapin slmt ulang taun. ahhaha. katanya di jam dia udah lewat stngah jam -________-

trus ada bbrp sms, trus ditelf lagii sama rene. ngobrol2 bentaar. matiin telf. ga lama dtelf lagi sama tian + dunde, di conference gtu hahah. seru deh sambil gegosipan, udah lama ga telfonan sm tian hehe. truus abis itu pada sms2 lagi gtu deh hehe.

si gembul masa gamau ngucpain di telf, katanya maunya ketemu -_______-

trus yaudah kaan ga lama gw tidur.

pginya kebangun gara2 ada sms, dari gembul, katanya valen gamau nemenin ke sency. rrrrrghhh. bikin bete pagi2. skip aja deh pokoknya bete, dan si gembul gajadi nyamper ke sency,

yaudah gw ol, buka laptop, udah ada 99 notifications, dan itu isinya wall semua. fyi, itu baru jam 8 pagi. gw shock. haha.

trus buru2 ke gereja, abis gereja mau lunch bareng sekeluarga ( minus nysa soalnya dia lagi liburan sndri sama tante gw ber2 ke KL ) dan gw yang milih tempatnya haha.

karena udah lama ga makan di spageddies, gw mint makan dsana. tapi gajadi gara2 mbaknya nyoloooot. haha.

trus gw pngn olive fried rice nya jittlada, akhirnya turun deh ke bawah. ehehe. gw makan 2 porsi loh. kenyang bangeeeettt hhahaha. parah deh enaknya ;p pedes2 seger gimanaaa gtu haha.

abis ituuu tadinya mau ketemu panji tapi gajadi gara2 hpny mati ternyata, sms gw ga dibales lg -_____- dan gw mau cabut ke JPC Kemang, bokap lagi nyari kamera ehee.

yaudah deeeh akhirny di rumah doang. ol bales2in wall sampe tangan gw pegel bgt hehe anw, makasih yaaa semua yang udah ngucapin dan doain :DD

truuus rada maleman beli kue ke holland bakery cinere gara2 tadi siang ga ada yang inget beli haha dodol. trus males jauh2, jadi ke cinere aja deh hehe. milih2 kue, akhirny tiramisu lagi -_____- tapi ga nyesel kok, whip cream nya enak gtuuu kaya es krim vanilla, sama sekali ga kaya whip cream. hahah.

trus jadi si gembul bilang gtu pas jam 6-7an gtu : tar malem aku telf ya.

trus akhirnya dtelf deeeh truss.. yagitu deh ahuahahaha tuh baca aja di postingan sblmny hehe.

yaaa intinya my 18th is quite a blast, walopun ga ada makan2 sama temen2 ato gimana hehe.

thank God for adding one more year in my superb life :)

ihiiiy :D

2009-09-28T19:45:00.002+07:00

dia : " cewe, udah punya pacar belom? "

gw : " beloom"

dia : " mau punya gaa?"

gw : " hmmm. gatau yaaaaa"

dia : " mau jadi pacarku?"

gw : " hmmm. mau ga yaaaaa.."

few minutes later..

gw : " ahahaha okay."

20 : 27.

27. 09. 09

langgeng yaa mbuuuul! hehe amin.

aimichu ;)

bilang sayang berkali2 tapi ga maju2, useless ga sih?

2009-09-25T00:47:00.002+07:00

ahaha judul postingannay kesannya gw ngarep gtu ya, tapi gw kesel abisan kaya ga maju2 gtu ckck. gw di hak milik seenaknya gtu, ebuset, masih milik bersama ini! belom dilabelin, seenaknya aja. hahaha.

tadi gw ketemu O acil valen di citos, jalan bntr, trus cabut ke planetarium. gw shock, si acil ke cikini lewat ruas tol luar kota ahuahahaha gw shock beneran sumpah. trus pas nyampe planetarium, lumayaaaan rame, dan pertunjukannya adanya jam 16 30, gw takut kesorean ke kota tua nya jadinya gajadi aja deh :( trus ke kota tuanya pake nyasar gtuuu, jauh banget nyasarnya sampe ancol muahahaha. akhirnya balik lagi deh ke monas, si acil bilang taunya jalan ke glodok lewat monas, yaudah deh. haha. buang2 waktu gitu muter2 di jalan. wkwk.

pas nyampe kota tua langsung cari parkir trus foto2 hehe. trus ketemu frans gtu di kota tua, foto2 lagi. bangles gw masa pataaaah :( padahal gw suka banget tu bangles, cuma beli 1 lagi di beli. soalnya bentukny lucu gtu, ga cuma bulet biasaaa huuuu :( udah gabisa disambung lagi jadi yaudah deh pasrah. ga lama frans pamit, mau pergi katanya. trus kita makan bakso deh. pas bangeet gw emg udah kelaperan gara2 ga makan siang, dan itu udah jam 5an. weheey. trus abis makan bakso, kita keeee ada orang yang gelar kuis catur gtu, gw bs mecahin sih tp katanya ternyata apalah remis ato apa gw ga ngerti smp skrg drtd dijelasin juga haha.

trus abis itu sepedaan, gw kan gabisa naik sepeda yaa, trus dibonceng sama O hehehe. keliling2 sambil makan lollypop, dimintain anak kecil lollypopnya, diliatin orang* ga pernah liat bule ya? ckck haha* trus akhirnya balik lagi deh nyari valen sm acil gara2 nemu spot foto bagus. hehe. eeeh ternyata SLR nya valen batrenya abiiiissss grrr :( mana frans uda pulang, jadi kan itu tinggal the one and only SLR left. huhu. stop foto2 deh. abis itu balik.

ga langsung balik sih, makan dulu di GI hehe. baru deh balik ke rumah.

apa yang terjadi selama perjalanan, i have to keep it for myself wkwk. maaf gabisa cerita hahaha.

when he hold my hand, he gave me the 'butterfly in the stomach' feeling, too. sooo, i decided to open the window of my heart. baru jendela. ga berani buka pintu lebar2 hehe.

supposed to be holiday.

2009-09-24T11:23:00.004+07:00

kemaren2 gw abis dari bali lagi haha. agak bosen juga sih, cuma berhubung kmrn beda rombongan ( sama keluarga ) jadi ya lumayan lah apalagi belanjanya hahaha beda banget sama pas pergi sndri brg temen2. yet, haunted by the old memories there. pas jalan di legian, di kintamani, otw kesanasini, huffh. it's supposed to be holiday, tapi bokap nyokap malah banyak marah2ny gtu yaampun. padahal bokap kmrn ulangtaun juga yang ke-50 ( happy birthday. dad! ), udahlah yaa gausa marah2 harusnya liburan, remember?

it's quite fun actually. i rode on slingshot again. for the 2nd time. kali ini sama nysa haha. i still love the sensation. and i would love to ride on it anytime. haha.

masa ya, si vicky ( ade gw yang paling kecil yang baru umur 4,5 taun ) nangis gtu pas gw naik slingshot gara2 katanya taku gw sm kakak gw mati hahahahaha kocak abis haha.

abis dari bali yaa di rumah aja. hehe. kmrn selasa sempet ke cinere mall gtu trus akhirnya disusulin sama si O sama temennya si Acil, akhirnya ketemu di ohlala truuuussss.. semua pegang hp. yak bagus. haha jauh2, ketemu cuma mainan hp. ckck. soo awkward haha. paraah.

trus cuma bntran gtu sih stngah jam an doang trus mereka pamit balik, mau pergi lagi. yaudah.

hari ini gw mau pergi lagi sama O, Acil, Valen * anak jb, bukan ade gw * , sama frans ke kota tua. haha foto menyusul ya* kalo niat masukinnya ;p*

i got a lot assignments -.- gosh, it's supposed to be holiday! grrr.

belom ada yang gw kerjain pula hahaha males banget soalnya. kebut aja deh besok, yang penting hari ini seneng2 dulu eheeey ;p

got to go, toodles!